-
Unknown A
Joe Rogan podcast. Check it out. The Joe Rogan Experience. Train my day. Joe Rogan Podcast by night, all day. Good to see you, my friend. It's been too long.
-
Unknown B
What's up, fool? Good to see you too.
-
Unknown A
When was the last time I saw you, brother? It was like five years ago or something.
-
Unknown B
Five years ago. And I did the show here. When you were in la? Yeah, at the warehouse.
-
Unknown A
Damn. That's what I miss most about the store is, you know, traveling dudes. We would meet up. We'd meet up at the home base. Yes.
-
Unknown B
And now when I was a young comic, I would see like older comics like that I will see on television. They would just come hang out at that bar or the patio.
-
Unknown A
Just get a refresh.
-
Unknown B
Yeah. And you pass by and you say, oh, yeah, that's Arsenio Hall.
-
Unknown A
That's Elaine Boosler OG right there.
-
Unknown B
You know, you're like, what? Right. I used to see her at Dodger Stadium when I work at Dodger Stadium. And I would ask her for advice and she was just, you know, like every comic back then. Just keep writing.
-
Unknown A
She's a funny comic. Yeah, she was a funny comic. Who's that lady that was on Curb youb Enthusiasm? She's very funny too. Old school comic. God damn it. I'm very embarrassed that I forgot her name. She hasn't done comedy in a long time. Look that up. Yes. Suzy Essman.
-
Unknown B
Oh, Suzy Essman. There, Stand up.
-
Unknown A
Yes. Oh, she was great. She was really funny. I middled for her once in like 1989 or some way back in the day.
-
Unknown B
Who you metaphor that lady. Wow.
-
Unknown A
Yeah, yeah. Someplace on Long Island. I can't. Might have been like governors or something like that. I don't. I do not remember, but I remember she was very nice. She was very funny. Very nice. Very encouraging.
-
Unknown B
Which is the.
-
Unknown A
The best, man? When you get to work with someone that you see on television and you just like starting out and they're nice to you, that's so valuable.
-
Unknown B
I can't believe it. Like when I. When I want it, there she is. Whoa. She looked like Elaine from Seinfeld.
-
Unknown A
Yeah. Similar.
-
Unknown B
But that's the haircut back then, huh?
-
Unknown A
Yeah.
-
Unknown B
Well, they all had.
-
Unknown A
Everybody lost their mind in the 80s.
-
Unknown B
Ali Lieberman.
-
Unknown A
Yeah, they all. They all lost their mind back then because, like, from the 70s to the 80s, nobody knew how to dress. They did crazy shit with their hair.
-
Unknown B
She's going over her set. Yeah.
-
Unknown A
They would all tease their hair up. It was crazy. There was like a big hair thing, I think it was when people started doing cocaine. That's what I think. I think is the 80s was Miami Vice and cocaine. Everybody lost their mind. They lost their fashion sense. People started wear wacky clothes. Cars started looking like, yeah, man, the Saab Pinto, bro. Cars just started looking like. I mean, it's. If you wanted objective analysis of what happens to a society when they remove marijuana and mushrooms and then they bring in cocaine.
-
Unknown B
It's like, hey, you know what it's called? I call Ford Fiesta.
-
Unknown A
Yeah.
-
Unknown B
Cause we were Fiesta yesterday.
-
Unknown A
But cocaine brought us Sam Kinison, too, though. You have to. Real cocaine's done some good.
-
Unknown B
You think he did a lot. A lot, a lot.
-
Unknown A
No, no. It's like. It's terrible for everybody who does it, but. But I do think that there's moments of inspired creativity from all kinds of substances. Especially that rock and roll cocaine that they used to get where it was like just real, pure cocaine. It wasn't stepped on, didn't have amphetamines and fentanyl in it. All kinds of other shit, good shit.
-
Unknown B
None of the stuff you probably can grab wrapped with Iowa.
-
Unknown A
And I should say this as a person who's never tried cocaine. Never, Never. Never tried cocaine.
-
Unknown B
I'd be lying.
-
Unknown A
No, I would not lie.
-
Unknown B
Never.
-
Unknown A
No. Never. No. I got real lucky when I was in high school. I had a buddy of mine and his cousin started selling it, and he was a great guy. And I watched this dude kind of like shrink into himself and lost a ton of weight. And him and his girlfriend just. They had this attic apartment, and they would just hang out and do coke and sell coke, and they would just like, watch TV and do coke. And it was.
-
Unknown B
Wow.
-
Unknown A
It was like they got bit by a vampire, man. He scared the shit out of me.
-
Unknown B
I was afraid of cocaine, man, because when I started stand up, like, I started standing back in 94, 93 at an open mic, and I was clean, I was sober. I. Over the year, I was in rehab and I wanted to be a comedian. So I went to a library to learn about writing. Gene Perrette Comedy writing step by step, another book called how to Write Funny, Be Funny and Make Money Being Funny. And that was a real great book, bro. I mean, it had comedy clubs locations in the back and it had booker numbers. Like to submit your comedy. Yeah.
-
Unknown A
Remember the Comedy USA industry guide?
-
Unknown B
$100. Yeah. Can you believe that shit, bro?
-
Unknown A
I remember dudes used to take out full page ads. That's how you knew they were killing it. When a dude would take out a full Page ad in the comedy USA industry, guy. I'm like, wow, he's got a full page ad.
-
Unknown B
I remember, bro, when I was looking for gigs like in 2000, right? And I remember this comedian named Shang and Dante. Comedian Dante.
-
Unknown A
I remember those guys.
-
Unknown B
Those guys had a list, like a five page list of comedy bookers names, NACA numbers to call. And the back of the page was shitty bookers to avoid. And they signed it to the comics for like 75 bucks.
-
Unknown A
Wow. I got lucky that I was in Boston and Boston had. There was. That was like the boom happened in Boston when like Stephen Wright got on Tonight Show. Everybody found out about Boston, but it was already this like crazy community. This is a great documentary called When Stand up stood out.
-
Unknown B
You had the guy on the show here.
-
Unknown A
Yeah, I've had a few of those guys on the show.
-
Unknown B
It was like a Chinese restaurant.
-
Unknown A
Yes. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Don Gavin, who's one of those guys? Steve Sweeney. Legends. I still say to this day there's some of the best comics I have ever seen in my life. I've seen them murder harder than anybody I've ever seen in my life. But it was just very regional, very local, and a lot of it didn't translate nationally for some reason. Like Steve Sweeney in Boston, in front of a Boston audience is the funniest guy that's ever lived. And I'm not kidding, I'm not exaggerating. He would get like Boston accents and Boston attitudes. It would be all a big part of his act. And dude, it was murderous. If you had to follow that, you were. You were fucked, man. And they would do that to dudes from out of town. It was the most ruthless, cruel shit they would do at Nick's Comedy Stop.
-
Unknown A
They would take these assassins, these local assassins and stack them one after the other. It would be Kenny Rogerson, Don Gavin, Steve Sweeney. And then they throw up some headliner. And this poor headliner is used to soft acts on the road. He's used to being known for the guy who was on television. Hey, folks, so I'm Mike, you know, sitcom. And they try to do stand up, but just they were getting eaten alive.
-
Unknown B
He's talking about nuggets. The guys were up there all coked out. Oh, yeah, they were working the crowd.
-
Unknown A
They were wild boys too. They were big, like football player sized, wild, crazy drinkers and partiers. And they were funny, man. And so because there was this like love of comedy in Boston, they had all these comedy nights all over the place where you could make a living so you could be like a half assed comedian like I was. And, you know, you can make 500 bucks a week just hustling, just moving around. And that's what we all did. So there was so many places that you could work and so many like little booking agents and like, like western Massachusetts. You have to go out there, like, you know, like there's these weird towns that are like liberal hideouts, you know what I mean? Like Amherst. You'd get like Amherst gigs. It was weird.
-
Unknown B
Like Massachusetts. The other place you gotta be from there to pronounce it right.
-
Unknown A
Which one is that?
-
Unknown B
The one is that you did for a steak sauce.
-
Unknown A
Oh, Worcester.
-
Unknown B
Worcester.
-
Unknown A
Yeah. Yeah, it looks weird.
-
Unknown B
2010, I was doing last comic standing there and I got there a day early and I hung out with a Boston comic. I think his uncle. Is that the guy that caught that was missing in action. The Irish gangster. David Bolger is a comedian. Yeah. And he was. I said, yeah, man, where you performing? Worcester, sir. And then he took the joint. He goes, no, bro, it Worcester. Okay. Thank you for telling me, bro.
-
Unknown A
Yeah. You don't want to say, hey, Worcestershire, nice to be here. They would fucking kill you. They're like, that's where the great Doug Stanhope is from.
-
Unknown B
Yeah, Worcester.
-
Unknown A
Doug Stanhope started in Worcester.
-
Unknown B
I love him.
-
Unknown A
He's the best. All right. It's February, and by now 80% of people have probably abandoned their New Year's resolutions. And it makes sense. Life can get crazy and all of a sudden you don't have the time. But one easy habit to stick with is AG1. It's an easy, realistic habit that you can make to benefit your whole body health. AG1 makes hard to get micronutrients easy to get and replaces multiple vitamins and supplements with just one scoop. You just mix it in some cold water, Take a nice moment in the morning to do your body right. And honestly, it tastes pretty good. It's not easy to pack this many high quality ingredients with this much nutrient density, but Ag1 makes it happen without added sugars or artificial sweeteners ever. AG1 is a great way to invest in your health now and in the long run, which is why I've partnered with them for so long.
-
Unknown A
Try AG1 and get a free bottle of vitamin D, 3, K2 and five free AG1 travel packs with your first subscription at drink ag1.com Joe Rogan that's a $76 value gift for free when you go to drink ag1.com Joe RogAN Check it out.
-
Unknown B
I had a first comedy album. The one he did with Roaring or something.
-
Unknown A
Oh, the one we did with music in the background.
-
Unknown B
Yeah.
-
Unknown A
That was great. That's a great.
-
Unknown B
There was a place like that, like Boston Place, but not in a documentary. But Will Durst, he's a San Francisco comedian.
-
Unknown A
Sure.
-
Unknown B
He had a room like that called the Comedy Zoo or the. The Zoo.
-
Unknown A
Holy City Zoo.
-
Unknown B
Holy City Zoo.
-
Unknown A
Yeah.
-
Unknown B
And there's a comedian that came out of there that's a killer comic. And he's still alive. And he opens for me and he opened for Rob Schneider and Papa. And he opened up a lot of people. Larry Bubbles Brown.
-
Unknown A
Oh, cool.
-
Unknown B
And he's an old school guy. After every joke he goes mer. But he did the. He did Letterman in 1992 and then he did it again in 2006. So he has a record for doing Letterman between 30 years.
-
Unknown A
Wow.
-
Unknown B
But one of those comments that, like, never left San Francisco.
-
Unknown A
There's a few of those guys that got trapped like that.
-
Unknown B
Yes.
-
Unknown A
That were like, really good guys. Remember that one guy in Chicago. Fuck.
-
Unknown B
What was his.
-
Unknown A
Larry. Larry Reeb.
-
Unknown B
Larry Reeb.
-
Unknown A
Remember Larry Reeb? He was a guy like that, like a really solid national act. But it was so Chicago. He kind of stayed around there mostly. It was like every now. And you'd find towns like that. You had like one murderer that lived in the town.
-
Unknown B
Bob Marley in New England.
-
Unknown A
Yes. Bob Marley was the murderer of Maine. Robert Schimmel was Arizona.
-
Unknown B
I love Robert Schimmel.
-
Unknown A
He was the best. He was the best. He was such a good guy. But he was. He lived in Phoenix and it was somewhere in that area. I think it was Phoenix. But for him it was like, it was easier to get around the country that way. And he didn't want to be a part of. He was like one of the first guys that I was like, oh, you could like, be a big time comic and not have to leave your state. Like, you get to a point where you can live in Oklahoma, like Larry the Cable guy does. Probably. Where does he live? He lives in, like somewhere like Georgia or something like that.
-
Unknown B
I don't know. In the country.
-
Unknown A
Is that where he lives, though? I don't want to give up his. I'm not trying to dox him.
-
Unknown C
He's like on the radio there.
-
Unknown A
But I think, yeah, he's definitely from there. I just don't know if he lives there. Probably shouldn't say where he lives. But that dude is. He could be anywhere. It doesn't matter. Like, you could. You could just go Anywhere.
-
Unknown B
I like to see his face when I go to El Paso. Common Strip. And all the dudes you're talking about, they were all there, dude.
-
Unknown A
I remember Josh Wolf showed me a picture that he took when he was on stage and they were doing. It was like 60,000 people. So Larry the cable guy was doing like 60,000 people. And Josh Wolf's, like, got his camera and he's, like, moving around on stage like. That is the craziest fucking thing I've ever seen. That crowd is so insane. That's how big that guy got.
-
Unknown B
Thousand people, man.
-
Unknown A
And he was another dude that got hated on for no reason other than his success. It was like, for some reason, everybody couldn't believe that you could say offensive things as a joke in a character all of a sudden. And it had so coincidentally happened at the same time as him getting super huge. It's like, you guys are just fucking haters.
-
Unknown B
That's crazy how when they start hating the. The character but not the person.
-
Unknown A
Well, that's the dice thing.
-
Unknown B
Yeah, right? Just like the guy with. They used to have that puppet in New York.
-
Unknown A
Oh, Adam George.
-
Unknown B
Yeah, Greg. Geraldo. When I opened for him back in the day back in Addison Improv, he told me that he would say the nastiest shit, that puppet. And this lady threw shit at the puppet, but not at an auto, bro.
-
Unknown A
We were talking about it Tuesday night in the green room. We were talking about how that puppet was kind of possessed. And I'm not even bullshitting, you know, Otto was out there. Otto was out there. I mean, he was out there, everybody. I mean, that dude pardied, he went hard, and he was a genius comedian. But he would get rides to gigs and say, pull over. I gotta check on George. And he would. In the fucking side of the highway, he would pull over, pop the trunk and check on the dummy.
-
Unknown B
Wow. His buddy.
-
Unknown A
Weird, man.
-
Unknown B
Weird, man. Weird.
-
Unknown A
Someone.
-
Unknown B
Oh, there he is, bro.
-
Unknown A
Someone stabbed that dummy once. Yeah, Danger Fields. Some Puerto Rican guy who said the dummy was saying Puerto Rican jokes to this guy and the guy stabbed the dummy. Stab.
-
Unknown B
Was it a knife or a sharp knife or a sharp bed spring, bro.
-
Unknown A
Something, anything, whatever. You got the polish down to a point.
-
Unknown B
You watched the fabulous Ms. Maisel? What?
-
Unknown A
That.
-
Unknown B
The fabulous Ms. Maisel is about a female comic growing up in the 50s on Amazon.
-
Unknown A
No. Oh, fabulous Mrs. Basil.
-
Unknown B
Mrs. Maisel. Oh, she's Mrs. All right. I made her.
-
Unknown A
She was saying something in Spanish. That's hilarious.
-
Unknown B
You ever seen Mousie Maciol?
-
Unknown A
That's hilarious. I Literally thought you were talking about a completely different show.
-
Unknown B
Do you remember the ventriloquist? The. I did like a one minute set on her show.
-
Unknown A
Yeah, well, so like, ventriloquist now. It's like. It's one of those things, like with Carrot Top, he's like, so successful at props that no one does props anymore. But when we first started out, everybody did props. There was like 10 guys on a lineup of 20 guys that have props they bring with them on stage. Because sometimes it was really funny.
-
Unknown B
Rusty Dooley.
-
Unknown A
Yeah, Rusty Dooley was great at it. But it's like he owned that for whatever reason, because Carrot Top got so big using props. He's the only guy that still does it, that he kind of owns that. And then with Jeff Dunham, he got so big at being a ventriloquist. Like, there's no ventriloquist anymore. Like, when we were kids, there was always comedy ventriloquist. There was like Willie, Tyler and Lester. Remember, there was like a. It was a. It was a fun thing. You get the dummy to say fucked up shit, and then you go, I can't believe you could say that front of these nice people. And then George be like these people. He would tell everybody, suck his.
-
Unknown B
It was like.
-
Unknown A
It was crazy.
-
Unknown B
What's another one? Woody. Woody in the hood.
-
Unknown A
Yeah. Well, with Otto and George, it was a little different, man. Because I think George. I think Otto believed that George was alive. I think Otto believed there was something about George that was different than him. Like he was not Otto and George, he was just Otto. And George only existed when George was there. And it seemed like there was something going on with that. And it might be because he fried his brain to the point where he was connecting with, you know, all kinds of energy that wasn't even there. You know, he might have been out. He was out there. He was out there.
-
Unknown B
But the combination.
-
Unknown A
What if they crack together? Yeah, he probably made George smoke it. Yeah, there's famous Otto crack stories. He was. That guy was gone. But he was also brilliant. Really funny man. Fucking funny. And we in a comics. Comic, like, we would all sit in the back of the room to watch when he was on stage. But so there's a lot of those guys that are like, real genius, but they're real eccentric. And for whatever reason, the general public doesn't find out about him. There's not like a good vehicle. At least back then there wasn't for them to get out to the general public. Like today, I would say an example of that is like, Brian Holtzman.
-
Unknown B
Yes.
-
Unknown A
Right. Like Brian Holtzman we've known forever. He's always been a guy we all watched. He was always the guy that at the end of the night, especially if something fucked up happened, like there was a plane crash or like someone got eaten by a lion.
-
Unknown B
You mentioned a plane crash. Because I was there when they did that joke. I was at the back of the Comedy Store. He said, american Airlines is hiring. And then he said, because I remember who's he. I remember who survived that airline. And he said, fuck that. Everybody says, how come they don't build a plane out of the black box or stimulate to the black box. Stimulates to a fucking baby. Baby survive. Let me hold that baby bitch on the way down. Yeah, Baby survived an airline at the flight one time and he said, oh, I want to hold that baby. I want to hold somebody baby in an airplane just in case it goes down. Because if a baby survive, I'm going to survive.
-
Unknown A
You have to see him say it. I don't think we're doing it justice.
-
Unknown B
I'm fucking it all up.
-
Unknown A
My favorite one was when Susan Smith got arrested for drowning her kids. He goes, I heard those are bad kids. I heard they sat that close to the tv. They didn't put away their blocks. Those kids will not be missed.
-
Unknown B
The.
-
Unknown A
The fun thing about Brian is if you know him like in real life, he's like the sweetest guy on earth. He's such a sweetheart of a guy, like, super friendly to everybody, loves everybody. Like, he doesn't even have an enemy. Like, Brian Holtzman has no enemies. He's always sweet and friendly. And then he gets on stage and it's like he becomes like his version of George. Yeah.
-
Unknown B
I hung out with Brian Holtzman. I hung out with Brian Holtzman and his mom in San Antonio, Texas.
-
Unknown A
Oh, wow.
-
Unknown B
Because we were doing the Latino Laugh Festival.
-
Unknown A
Oh, wow.
-
Unknown B
And he was the only non Latino on the show. Him and Darren Carter and bro, there was all Latinos, bro. Everybody was getting shit. Johnny Sanchez pronounced his name like an American. And somebody yelled out loud, it's Sanchez.
-
Unknown A
How did they say it?
-
Unknown B
I don't know. He said, hello, my name is Johnny Sanchez. And then somebody said, no, it's Sanchez with five A's. Sanchez.
-
Unknown A
Oh, boy.
-
Unknown B
So he got heckled.
-
Unknown A
So he got heckled for saying his name in a non Mexican way.
-
Unknown B
Yes. And then Brian Hman goes up there.
-
Unknown A
Bro, it's rough out in those streets.
-
Unknown B
And Brian Hman was up there. He said. He goes, this is not a comedy show. Close all the doors. Border Patrol's going to come in here and take care of everybody, bro. But this is after. This is after we were doing this taping. A taping. Menia shows up, does a guest spot on our taping, and goes long, you know, really long, you know, like Jeff Valdez looking around. So then that's when Barry Holston goes up and murders it. He goes, man, I gotta figure out how to hold up this immigration problem, man. We got a bunch of U haul trucks. U haul trucks. We go around to every Home Depot. We ask these people, yeah, we're hiring, bro. There's lots of jobs. Muchos trabajos. Come on, get in the trucks. We fucking take these trucks. We drop them off in Tijuana, Mexico.
-
Unknown A
Yeah, you have to see him say it.
-
Unknown B
He starts screaming and shit.
-
Unknown A
But it's also like he's playing this bizarre psychotic character that only comes out when he's on stage. He's the most different when he's on stage.
-
Unknown B
And he's had his job, too. When he had a job, he always had a job. That was the problem.
-
Unknown A
That was the problem. He never hit. He never hit the road. He stuck around the store because like I was saying, there's not like a path for those guys. Like, nobody wanted Brian Holzman to open for them. That's too weird.
-
Unknown B
No.
-
Unknown A
He belonged at the store. And now he's found a crowd at the Mothership. His shows at the Mothership, they're all sold out. Like, he's hilarious. People come to see him and he didn't have a path before. It was like there was like, you know, he's too weird to put on a television show. It's like. It's like you gotta. You really want to be in the room. That's what it is.
-
Unknown B
Yeah.
-
Unknown A
This, like, if anybody is way funnier in the room, it's Brian Holtzman. The discomfort, the weirdness, and the way he works around it when you're in the room is so fun.
-
Unknown B
And every show's different.
-
Unknown A
Every show's different. And he's always talking about new things. He's like. I mean, it's really like he channels this fucking character. It's like he should be two different people. He should be Brian Holtzman, the super nice guy, and then whatever the fuck his name is when he's on stage. It's almost like he needs a second name. Mitzi should have done that a long time ago. Mitzi used to call Joey Fat baby. Do you remember those days?
-
Unknown B
Yeah.
-
Unknown A
Someone has one of the Lineups that they got from Jeff Scott. And on the lineup, it's got everybody's name and then, you know, 15 minutes and it says Fat Baby.
-
Unknown B
Fat Baby.
-
Unknown A
She wanted him to be called Fat Baby.
-
Unknown B
Weird advice. Sometimes, man, the managers give you terrible advice.
-
Unknown A
Can't listen to any of them.
-
Unknown B
I know, man.
-
Unknown A
What good advice.
-
Unknown B
I was bummed out one time because, you know, you have to go back and forth, back and forth till they make you a regular. And I was trying at the Laugh Factory, and one time, Jay Masada, he told me, I don't see you making it, man, for another six to eight years.
-
Unknown A
Oh, boy.
-
Unknown B
And then when I finally got last couple of standing, I looked at him, I said, you were Jamie. You're. Everybody was full of shit. It took 12. It took 12, not six. But I was bummed out when he told me that. I was like, bummed out. You know, you get bummed out. Like, you realize you put in all this work and it's like, you know, you can't be a regular here, so you got to go back to these other rooms. I talked to Brad Williams and he said that advice, bro. You know what he told me? He said. He told me that I should get all the little people I can find in Hollywood, all of them, all the little midgets, all the little persons, and bring them to the Laugh Factory. And Jamie said, you can have the biggest little person show in all of Hollywood.
-
Unknown B
That was his advice for Brad. So I was not feeling so bad after that. Then I talked to Alonzo Bowden, and he told Alonzo Bowden that he should put on shoulder pads and be a football comic. So Joe, after hearing that, I don't want to cry anymore.
-
Unknown A
Oh, my God. He had some terrible advice. I think it was. He was giving advice. I think it was. He was giving this advice to Todd Parker. He was telling him it was either Todd Parker or Robbie Prince, two guys that I knew from Boston. One of them, he was telling him, I think it's Toddler. You've gotta be Generation X guy. This is what you're going to be, buddy. You're going to be Generation X guy. So from Generation X, this is how I see the world, buddy. Everything was as a Generation X guy. And he was like, that's the worst advice I've ever heard in my life. Why would I do that? But people would have schemes for you. But the thing is, they're just trying to help, but no one knows how to do it other than you. And you gotta figure it out. No one can tell you.
-
Unknown B
Yeah, they're outdated, too.
-
Unknown A
Like, who would have told Mitch Hedberg, wear sunglasses and sometimes turn your back to the crowd?
-
Unknown B
No one.
-
Unknown A
No one. Mitch Hedberg would be killing with his back to the crowd, high on heroin, all non sequiturs for like an hour and a half.
-
Unknown B
Did they have stage fright?
-
Unknown A
He was just crazy, you know, Boy, with him.
-
Unknown B
You met him?
-
Unknown A
I met him. I didn't know him well, but I knew him enough that it was a bummer when he died. I remember I was with Stanhope. We were filming something, and we found out that he had gangrene. He got admitted to a hospital. He had gangrene. Like, yo, gangrene kills people. Like, this is scary. And, you know, he just had a problem. He just liked that heroin, and he didn't want to stop. Like, people wanted to clean him up. He did not want to get cleaned up. It's like, I am not interested.
-
Unknown B
I did her in one time, but I didn't show it up. I just smoked it. But I was in Amsterdam, dude.
-
Unknown A
It doesn't seem like anybody has a great old time with the rest of their life once they start doing heroin. It's like cocaine. It's the same thing. It's like. I think there's probably moments of brilliance that have come out of heroin, though. I definitely do. When I think about 1960s music, I think heroin and LSD affected a lot of rock and roll in the 1960s. And cannabis for sure, too, and probably mushrooms. But, you know, the. The thing that. It always kills you. Like, everybody always. It always ruins everything. They all died young. Everybody. Like, but Morrison, 27. Hendrix, 27. Although there is a wild conspiracy about Hendrix.
-
Unknown B
Yeah, yeah. What? You hear that?
-
Unknown A
He was killed by his manager. The conspiracy. There's. There was one of his bodyguards, right? Is that what. It was Jamie that wrote this book.
-
Unknown B
How did he die?
-
Unknown A
I think he died of his asphyxiation from throwing up. You know, which is one thing that can happen to people that are doing drugs. But the bodyguard. I believe this. Don't hold me to this, but I believe the story was Hendrick was going to leave his manager. His manager was mobbed up. His manager was like, a scary guy, and his manager is making a lot of money with Hendricks. Hendrix is trying to leave, and he's got the rights to the Hendrix catalog, and he kills Hendricks. So his former roadie. So the thing that's compelling about this is, shortly after this, his girlfriend Tappy committed suicide. Air quotes. By being thrown off a roof. So they Got rid of Hendrix and they got rid of his girlfriend, if that's what really happened. So he was the benefactor, allegedly, of the guitarist. $2 million life insurance policy.
-
Unknown A
$2 million, okay. Worth around 1.2 million in 1970, according to Wright. Jeffrey told him about the crime in 1971, a year after the 27 year old Hendricks was found dead in a London hotel. He said, I had to do it, Tappy. Wright claims the manager said, you understand, don't you? I had to do it. You know damn well what I'm talking about. We went round to his hotel room, got a handful of pills, stuffed them into his mouth, then poured a few bottles of red wine deep into his windpip. Hendrix is found dead at the Samarkand Hotel on 18th of September 1970. The cause of death was recorded as barbiturate intoxication and inhalation of vomit. I could still hear the conversation, Wright wrote of Jeffrey's confession. See the man I'd known for so much of my life, his face pale, hand clutching at his glass in sudden rage.
-
Unknown A
Hendrick's manager died in a plane crash in 73. So this guy's dead that supposedly did this list, man, they did that back then. They were gangsters. There was gangsters running everything. If there was a lot of money to be made, scary people moved in and it became a real problem.
-
Unknown B
Yeah, man, gangsters on a lot of stuff that a lot of people wouldn't want to own. Like a gay club?
-
Unknown A
Uh huh. Yeah.
-
Unknown B
Like in la, they own all the gay clubs. They were not rated because they were paying.
-
Unknown A
This episode is brought to you by BetterHelp. People like to throw around all these red flags, you know, things someone says or does that you don't like, which is fine. But instead of focusing on the negative all the time, why don't we focus on the positive? If you're looking for a romantic partner, think about what traits you like to see in a person. If you like to work out and stay in shape, you might want to find someone who's also health conscious or. Or if you like to travel, you probably want to find someone who's just as adventurous. Now, once you're in a relationship, it's a whole different ball game and things aren't always going to be perfect, but that's what therapy is for. Therapy is an excellent way to work through any problems, even the small ones. Like, say, you and a loved one have been fighting a lot lately, but you still really want to make things work.
-
Unknown A
Therapy can serve as a mediary it can help you identify the problem and and teach you positive ways to address it. If you're new to therapy or want to try something different, BetterHelp is a great place to start. It's convenient and affordable. Since everything is done online, it's already helped over 5 million people worldwide. Connect with a credentialed therapist. Discover your relationship green flags with better help. Visit betterhelp.com jre to get 10% off your first month. That's BetterHelp. H-E-L-P.com jre but if you want to talk about something like that, like, would a manager kill a client for a life insurance policy? Back then, yeah, I read this. They didn't even have DNA back then, man.
-
Unknown B
I read this where I like crazy, right? My mom didn't like Elvis. She liked the Beatles, right? And I asked my mom, you don't like fucking Elvis? He's badass, too, because Elvis said that I'd rather sleep with, have kids, a dog that a Mexican woman. And I said, when did he say that? And he goes, he said it. Then I found out later on when I went in a rabbit hole, it was a Colonel. The Colonel spread that.
-
Unknown A
The Colonel spread that because he didn't want to.
-
Unknown B
He wanted to keep him in America and not tour, like, anywhere.
-
Unknown A
The Colonel was an evil dude, man. Yeah, that. By the way, that Tom Hanks performance is fucking fantastic in that Elvis movie where he plays the Colonel.
-
Unknown B
Yeah.
-
Unknown A
Is. You know, when you see it, like, you appreciate how a guy can really, like, become a different person. Like, he becomes this creepy manager guy, this manipulative, gambling, creepy manager guy. I mean, he's genius, man. It's so good. Like, you really, you. That's what's crazy. Like, you forget that's Tom Hanks. You're like, oh. But you really got a sense of the relationship that Elvis had with this dude. Because those guys that get crazy, look, there's famous and then there's Elvis, famous in the 1960s. And you don't even understand what that means. No one understands what that means. And he was the first one to be like that. Imagine that.
-
Unknown B
I know. Imagine walking into a room. You just go. You want to kiss and they kiss.
-
Unknown A
Just imagine just trying to navigate life as a human being. And you're literally the most desired person to be around alive. Like, you can't walk down the street. People scream and they cheer and they run at you. Women faint, they cry. And there's never been someone like that before. That's what's crazy, because this Is the first time you've seen a guy on television and he's on television shaking his hips and so they go crazy.
-
Unknown B
No one ever done that, huh?
-
Unknown A
No. No. You never had a pop star on TV shaking his hips like he's fucking. Yeah. Was too much.
-
Unknown B
Did they cover it up the first time?
-
Unknown A
I think they did something where they were upset at him because they didn't know he was going to do it. I think it was like, I think he was actually going to get fined in some places. Like you weren't allowed to shake your hips like that. Like this is how crazy being Elvis was badass.
-
Unknown B
This is one video or picture of Elvis that I like besides the one you have here. You know, the rested when he's. He's playing outside an outside event and he's wearing all black and he's fucking young as hell. And the pompadour looking good. The blue as I shiny like bro, fading.
-
Unknown A
And there was no Elvis before Elvis. That's what's crazy. So he's like this one guy that becomes way more famous than any entertainer ever. And then he's got an evil manager and then he's doing pills and then just living in paranoia and the whole world don't make any sense. Nothing makes any sense. It can't make any sense. You have no peers. You have no one around you that's like you. No one around you that can understand you. And you're being protected by some guy who's like siphoning money from you.
-
Unknown B
He was doing shit little gigs, right? Like, he'll leave, he'll do like a two hour show, then leave, go do another two hour show somewhere else.
-
Unknown A
Well, I think he got into a financial bind, right? Wasn't that a part of the movie? And then he got that Vegas residency, bro. The Vegas residency is probably convenient because you don't have to go anywhere, you know. You know where you live, you know where the gig is. Like Carrot Top seems to like it, but I don't think I could do that, bro.
-
Unknown B
If you're a musician though, like Elvis, great.
-
Unknown A
Yeah. Oh yeah. But even like comics can do it. A lot of comics do it, you know, it's. I just don't know about living in Vegas.
-
Unknown B
I lose my mind being in the same place seven days a week, 14 shows.
-
Unknown A
The people that live outside of Vegas love it though. If you live like in like Henderson or some of those places, like they're very, very nice places. But it's still. You're still connected to this place where people go to get psychotic. There's some weird energy about that. I. Listen, this is not a knock on Vegas. I love Vegas. Look, I love New York City. Ari fucking loves living in New York City. I can't live in New York City. I can't handle all that. I gotta get the fuck away. Some people love it. You can use everybody. You love everything. But it just seems like that. It's like Vegas is a uniquely crazy place. People go there specifically. Like, we're gonna go to Vegas. It's like it's in the title of the state. Means craziness.
-
Unknown B
You went Vegas every. Every day. Probably 50,000 people show up.
-
Unknown C
It's every day.
-
Unknown A
And then you got rodeos coming into town and UFC fights coming into town and Raider fans. It's a wild ass town. I. I love being there. I just don't know if I could live there. I just. It seems like it's almost a little too crazy. So this is ed Sullivan Show, 1956.
-
Unknown C
This is the only time. This is the first time his hips show up on the screen is 10 minutes into this.
-
Unknown A
Yeah, he was wiggling his dick too much.
-
Unknown C
That's all he was doing, though.
-
Unknown A
That's a lot, Jamie. What do you mean that's all he was doing? That's offensive.
-
Unknown C
After this aired, they said they wouldn't air him from the waist down anymore.
-
Unknown A
Isn't that crazy?
-
Unknown C
But they obviously. He's barely. It's barely shown. It's so crazy, bro.
-
Unknown A
He probably had it. Look, his big old dick keeps slapping at his jacket. That's what it is. Look, if you see that side, back it up a little bit. That's what the problem is, Jamie. Look at that jacket popping up and down from his big old. Look at it.
-
Unknown B
He didn't assemble with it, bro.
-
Unknown A
He's. He's making his jacket pop with his dick. I'm with. I'm with the sensors. Of course he had a big dick. He had everything. Hit everything. He had voice, talent. Beautiful. You think he's gonna have a little dick?
-
Unknown B
Hell no.
-
Unknown A
All those gifts.
-
Unknown B
How tall is he?
-
Unknown A
I don't know. He's probably 6ft 1 years old there.
-
Unknown B
20 kid, man. Wow.
-
Unknown A
How can you manage that? How can you navigate that at 21 years old? It's him.
-
Unknown B
No, man.
-
Unknown A
Bro, it's him and Michael Jackson. These are the two case studies. And people that got too famous.
-
Unknown B
But sometimes I wonder, man, like, how would I handle that much success at that early age?
-
Unknown A
Bro, you wouldn't.
-
Unknown B
I know. That's what I'm saying.
-
Unknown A
You would Go crazy.
-
Unknown B
How about you?
-
Unknown A
Crazy. I would have gone crazy.
-
Unknown B
I would have been seeing you with a big fucking cold sore.
-
Unknown A
Yeah, dude, I got lucky.
-
Unknown B
My.
-
Unknown A
My fame ascent was a slow drip, you know, like, over time.
-
Unknown B
Oh, bro.
-
Unknown A
A slow drip.
-
Unknown B
Mine was like the little mountain guy on. On the Price is Right. Ki ki ki ki ki ki ki kitty ki ki. And then stopping along the way. Bunch of haters fighting with other comics. Coke here.
-
Unknown A
Yeah.
-
Unknown B
Hangar on. El Compadre is too long with Joey Diaz.
-
Unknown A
El Compadres is a spot. 64 years ago today, more than 60 million people watched Elvis Presley perform on the ed Sullivan Show. 60 million. That's so crazy. But that's how it used to be, man. When. And that's why losing control of that is so devastating to mainstream media. That was what it was when I was a kid. There was three channels, dude. There was NBC, abc, and cbs, and that was it. And then all sudden, there was Fox, and we were crazy.
-
Unknown B
Yeah. We got a whole nother channels too, though, in your neighborhood.
-
Unknown A
Yeah, yeah, we definitely did. Especially. Yeah, we all had. Everyone has local channels, so you always had, like, the local NBC network, which.
-
Unknown B
Somebody got in movies. Yeah.
-
Unknown A
We didn't even have cable. Like, it didn't exist.
-
Unknown B
We had.
-
Unknown A
You have to realize how nuts the world was when everything you watched on television was just television. That's all you ever saw. Like, there's no cable, so you have four channels. If you're. You felt so lucky to have that fourth channel. You got Simpsons Married With Children came on that channel. Fox changed the whole. In Living Color change the whole, like, feeling different. It's crazy that Fox is now connected to, like, conservative Republicans reporting the news. But it's like Fox, when we were kids, was Married with Children. It was, you know, it was like the renegade shows. It was the Simpsons. It was, you know, there was a bunch of, like, fun shows that were on shows, man.
-
Unknown B
Living Single.
-
Unknown A
Yeah. But In Living Color to this day, I say is one of. There's two of the greatest comic, like, Saturday Night Live always gets it for longevity because it's crazy. They've been around so long.
-
Unknown B
Sctv.
-
Unknown A
But for, like, pure funny. For me, it's like In Living Color and Chappelle Show.
-
Unknown B
Yeah.
-
Unknown A
I feel like you don't get Chappelle show unless you have In Living Color first. I feel like it there. I feel like In Living Color broke open the door for chaotic sketches that were, like, really funny, man. Wildly offensive. Really funny. To this day, like, there's a lot of shit on In Living Color that if you tried to do like in the height of wokeness, like three or four years ago, bro, they would fucking call for your censorship.
-
Unknown B
Yeah, they will come for you. Especially when Damon Wayans and David Language were doing Men on Film. There's an episode where. Where the camera falls.
-
Unknown A
Two snaps.
-
Unknown B
Yeah. The camera falls on Damon Wayan and he becomes heterosexual all of a sudden. And then David Linguil starts touching him. He go, make it away from me, man. That episode.
-
Unknown A
How about when he played Handyman? He played mentally.
-
Unknown B
I love that. Oh, my God, that's my favorite movie.
-
Unknown A
Yeah. A handicapped superhero. It was.
-
Unknown B
And he made a superhero movie about him. Handyman. He would fly like this.
-
Unknown A
Yeah, dude, this. This show was wild. Hilarious. Wildly offensive, but so funny.
-
Unknown B
Even Fire Marshal Bill, bro, he's making fun of a fire victim.
-
Unknown A
I was just gonna bring that up.
-
Unknown B
Let me tell you something.
-
Unknown A
That guy's whole face is burned off. Jesus Christ. Christ.
-
Unknown B
My daughter's a burn victim, by the way.
-
Unknown A
That's harsh, bro.
-
Unknown B
That's what you'll get.
-
Unknown A
Yeah, it's wild that shows like that one, bro.
-
Unknown B
Ahead of his time.
-
Unknown A
Oh, way ahead. Well, so was that other movie we were just talking about, that Ace Ventura. Ace Ventura, yeah. Yes. When you find out that she's a trans person and the dick comes out and everybody starts throwing up. First of all, I don't buy it. Even if she hadn't turned it. That photo again, that's Sean Young, right?
-
Unknown B
That's on Young.
-
Unknown A
Yeah, yeah. When she was hot. So even if she had a dick, there's a lot of guys who've been like, listen, nobody needs to know about that dick.
-
Unknown B
Nobody needs to know about that, man.
-
Unknown A
That dick is between you and me. And I can't.
-
Unknown B
I remember one time happened to me, bro, I just looked at it and going, wow, that big ass skin tag you got right there.
-
Unknown A
Duh. Skin tag, yeah. All those shows, like, I mean, what are the other great sketch shows? Mad TV had some bangers.
-
Unknown B
Mad tv.
-
Unknown A
There's some bangers on Mad tv. But it's another show.
-
Unknown B
Second City of tv. You watched so many.
-
Unknown A
Kids in the Hall.
-
Unknown B
Kids in the Hall.
-
Unknown A
Kids in the Hall. Kids in the hall was fantastic. That was great. You know, I was a Kids in the hall fan, but I didn't really start watching it, really get into it until after I'd met Dave. Like, I didn't know much about Kids in the Hall. I knew it was funny. I knew everybody said it was funny, but I don't think I'd ever even Watched a sketch and then I became friends with Dave doing newsradio. And then I started really getting into it. I was like, oh, this. That guy had a very unique, or still does have a very, very unique sense of humor. He rewrote, like, I don't know what percentage, 40% of, like, the lines on Newsradio, like, on the set.
-
Unknown B
Yeah.
-
Unknown A
Rewrites things all the time. And he was always, like, coming up with a better way to do something and always had, like, a sense of, like a pacing is. That's a totally different thing, man. When you're making sketches, like, sketches is a. To like, to be able to do that and do a lot of, like, really funny scenarios that are unique. That's a very.
-
Unknown B
It's hard, right? The stand up. Because we want to end it, huh?
-
Unknown A
Well, it's a totally different way of thinking. No, Gillian Keys is another fantastic one that did that to this day. Like, the problem with that show is, like, it's got this amazing fan core, fan base, but it doesn't. It's way funnier than the amount of people that have seen it. It's way funnier, which is crazy because Shane Gillis is one of the biggest comics in the world.
-
Unknown B
Yes.
-
Unknown A
He's one of the biggest comics on earth. He's selling out arenas everywhere.
-
Unknown B
Yes.
-
Unknown A
But yet people don't realize how good Gillian Keys is. It's like there's a one where they do the Onlyfans, Dad. It's one of the hardest I've ever laughed in my fucking life. It's so funny. It's so funny and so crazy. And because no one's telling them what to do, they're just doing what's funny. And that's what got fucked up. There were so many fucking nannies around, everybody telling everybody what you can and can't say, and so many subjects you can and can't cover. Like, you gotta stay out of the way. Just like the managers in the early days telling you, you need braids. You know braids, bro, with beads. And you talk about the beads when you're on stage.
-
Unknown B
Like, what, you wear a suit?
-
Unknown A
Shut the fuck up. Get out of here.
-
Unknown B
I remember one time, bro, they told me to wear a suit, and I wear it. And I saw Joe Deer wearing a suit, and I said, bro, he looked ridiculous. Huh? He was wearing a beanie. I remember I called him the Coca Cola Bear. He got mad.
-
Unknown A
Suits are a weird move, but they're. They're sometimes fun. I've worn suits on stage before. It makes you feel Different. It does.
-
Unknown B
You feel like you're gonna like change your posture or.
-
Unknown A
No, you just feel like more of a professional. Look at this. And a well tailored suit is what you really want. The kind like modern suits, you can move in them. Like they have like stretch to them, which is different than, you know, when I, when I was a kid, I thought of suits. I thought of like, you're handcuffed, like you can't move good. Yeah, like you can't kick someone with fucking suit pants on. You know, you can't move.
-
Unknown B
Well, no, I would see Johnny Carson, his suits. Yeah, those two suit look tight as hell.
-
Unknown A
Well, it's just they. The fabric sucked back then. If you, especially if you're a bigger person, you know, if you lift weights or something like that, if you have muscles, everything's going to be constricted and tight and all up. It's not going to fit good. So suits now, if you get a good one, like I got mine made by David August, they do them for the ufc and.
-
Unknown B
Yeah.
-
Unknown A
How to make a bunch of suits for me. They're amazing. They do it to your actual shape. So everything that's perfect.
-
Unknown B
You, I mean, I don't want to make fun of the other guys, but you're, you're announcing, you know, you're a big muscle guy, but it doesn't look like you're coming out of that suit when you wear it looks real good on you.
-
Unknown A
Yes. Because they make it to your shape.
-
Unknown B
You know, it's real sports, man. They're about to just come out. They don't like orangutans, bro. They're like, like Mr. Hyde.
-
Unknown A
Well, you know, a lot of those dudes are bigger than me anyway. There's a certain size that you get. Like if you put the Rock in a suit, it still looks ridiculous. It's like, what the fuck are you made out of, dude? First time I met him backstage at the ufc and he had cowboy boots on, right? So he's not even.
-
Unknown B
Cowboy boots.
-
Unknown A
Yeah. He don't even seem like a real person. Like, when you meet him in real life, you're like, how. What? What the fuck are you. He's like a superhero. Yeah, like you seeing like a real live superhero and a super nice guy, man. He came and worked out with us. We all worked out. Tony Hinchcliffe, Derek Hassan, we all fucking lifted weights together, hung out, got in the sauna. Shane Gillis, we're all just chilling with the Rock, working out with them. Like, no cameras, no nothing. I was like, let's we don't have to post this. Let's just have some fun. It's like, yeah. He was cool. As cool as, man.
-
Unknown B
Wow. That's amazing, man.
-
Unknown A
It was fun. I enjoyed talking to him. It's a good guy.
-
Unknown B
I was in the airplane at the Delta, and I saw Jason Momoa.
-
Unknown A
Oh, he's another one. And I said, a little too handsome for me.
-
Unknown B
I just said, what's up? No, I don't know how to meet people. I always have weird people. I said, jason, just like that, Jason, what's up? And then I didn't know that we were sitting almost close together on the airplane. Then he saw me again, bro. Then I said, what's up? Then I felt like I creeped him out again, man. And then my wife was recording him, bro. Recording him. But I was on my phone. He thought I was recording him.
-
Unknown A
But I met him in a Whole Foods parking lot. I met him in a Whole Foods parking lot in Woodland Hills. I was going to pick up some groceries and he was there, too. I was like, what's up, man? How you doing? What's going on? We were talking. I think that was before he did Conan, which I still say to this day. The movie's not good. Like the Conan movie. It's kind of falls apart. But the way it looked was amazing. And he played Conan, and he's the perfect Conan. Like, that's what Conan would have looked like. He wouldn't look like a bodybuild. No disrespect to Arnold. He looked amazing. But it's like Conan was just a big giant warrior. And when he played that guy, what was the guy played on Game of Thrones?
-
Unknown B
Crackle or something like that.
-
Unknown A
He was fucking incredible at that.
-
Unknown B
He played with.
-
Unknown A
That's Conan, man. Yeah, that's Conan. Someone needs to do a good Conan the Barbarian movie. Go back and read the Robert E. Howard books. The books are great. It's this super depressed dude in like, the 1930s writes about this barbarian. Yeah, Khal Drago. That's right.
-
Unknown B
Two people are getting mistaken by.
-
Unknown A
Bro, get. Get a photo of him when he was Conan. Jason Momoa as Conan.
-
Unknown B
Bro.
-
Unknown A
He's the perfect Conan right there. That's what Conan's supposed to look like.
-
Unknown B
That's how I'm supposed to look.
-
Unknown A
That's the perfect Conan. That's the Conan you believe is real. That's a guy throwing a sword around his whole life and fighting off dragons. He's not a bodybuilder. He looks like that. That's what it looks like in the book, like that Conan.
-
Unknown B
We're identical.
-
Unknown A
That's code. I mean, someone needs the guys still capable of playing this character. Someone please Me. I wish Quentin Tarantino was into Conan. Quentin, if you're hearing me, please read the books. Quentin Tarantino doing Conan would be the most epic thing of all time. Could you imagine he would do it, right?
-
Unknown B
Or Beastmaster, if he was into it.
-
Unknown A
He would have to be into it. I have no idea if he's into it, but if he was into it.
-
Unknown B
If Quinton TR might do it, somebody should. It'll start with the ending. It'll be like the ending of the movie in the beginning. And confused. Somebody confuses.
-
Unknown A
The books are great, man. Because it's. It's all from the mind of this tortured, depressed dude who winds up killing himself.
-
Unknown B
It'll be the first time that you'll see a Conan movie with everybody saying the N word over and over.
-
Unknown A
I don't think they had that word back then. I think if you want to do.
-
Unknown B
It right, they'll make it. They'll make one up.
-
Unknown A
I think if they really wanted to do it right, they should probably do it the way like Mel Gibson did Apocalypto.
-
Unknown B
That was a badass fucking movie. But you felt that movie.
-
Unknown A
Right? But, you know, I'm saying, like, hearing the people say it. And the same thing he did with the Passion, the Christ. They spoke in the language, and it was all subtitles, like they spoke in the language. So you were transmitted exactly how these people were saying. You felt like it was real, like apocalyptic. You felt like it was real, like there was no English in that movie. That is a blockbuster movie. That is a wild action adventure movie.
-
Unknown B
Then we were hardcore, man. Passion of the Christopolito.
-
Unknown A
There's something about being sucked into hearing the actual language of the people that would be doing this. It's so much better than. Because, like, whenever they do, like, Game of Thrones or something like that in another country also, everybody has an English accent.
-
Unknown B
Yes.
-
Unknown A
That's how they do it. Instead of talking like an American, you can't talk like us because that would just throw people off. So you have to have sort of a proper way.
-
Unknown B
The Exorcist, man. Like, if the Exorcist, the devil would have had, like, an Irish accent, it would have been totally different movie. But. But the Latin accent, the whatever language.
-
Unknown A
Latin language, Right, right. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, Exactly.
-
Unknown B
You don't even know what the language is. But you're scared, right?
-
Unknown A
It has to be Exotic. You can't have the devil going, hey, you piece of. I'm gonna your eyeballs.
-
Unknown B
You better get out of my garage.
-
Unknown A
Yeah, you can't have the devil talking like Jerry Seinfeld.
-
Unknown B
I speak in absolutes.
-
Unknown A
Yeah. You can't have the devil with a.
-
Unknown B
Whiny voice or a Boston accent.
-
Unknown A
That was the scariest thing about Mike Tyson is he in this voice. Voice that was so easy to make fun of. And he fucking murdered everybody. It was almost like he was begging you to make fun of his voice.
-
Unknown B
Dangerous dudes.
-
Unknown A
Yeah. It was almost like he was, like, begging you.
-
Unknown B
You're like, you, bro. You're like one of those guys. You're like. To someone who doesn't know you personally, you're like, try me.
-
Unknown A
No, I'm not like that at all, though. I'm really.
-
Unknown B
If I didn't know you and I saw you walking down the street and you're not Joe Rogan, I'd be like, okay, man, this guy's good. Fight. He's healthy. Stay away from him.
-
Unknown A
I'm friendly. That's what we all need, my friend. We need friendly.
-
Unknown B
But you've been friendly since day one, though. I was talking to the. Your driver, Rebel, about when you gave me that solo pipe.
-
Unknown A
Mm.
-
Unknown B
And then you say you stopped using it because of butane.
-
Unknown A
Yeah.
-
Unknown B
And I remember I was telling that the reason I call it solo pipe. Cause you're supposed to use it by yourself. But I remember I told everybody you gave it to me, and everybody wanted to hit it. And by the time I got it back, it was fucking hot.
-
Unknown A
Yeah, I remember those things. I try to stay like. I think if you're smoking a cigar, like, butane is the way to go. You know, you burn the end of it, but you don't want to, like, keep doing it. You want to. I feel like a certain amount of this is a chemical. No matter what. Look, that's a chemical. You only want so much of that. You really should probably have matches if you're going to light. If you're going to smoke a cigar. Matches. Yeah. You should really probably have matches. And I think if you're like a super cigar nerd, they do it even further. They take cedar and they light cedar strips, and they use that to light their cigar. Those are super nerds.
-
Unknown B
Cedar strips.
-
Unknown A
Cedar strips, dog pieces of wood. They light little strips of wood, and they light from pure wood. Then they light their cigar. This is super nerds when it comes to cigars. Like, they get into.
-
Unknown B
Oh, that's why that Guy said gangs in New York. Give me some ember.
-
Unknown A
Give me some ember.
-
Unknown B
Ember. What is ember? Fire. Oh. Oh, shit.
-
Unknown A
Yeah. So these guys, they. They take little cedar strips, they light them on fire, and then they light their cigar from the cedar strips. So this way you're not getting any of the butane fumes. I don't even know how much you would get. I don't, you know, get better later. Yeah, sure. You know how to work it? No. We're probably gonna find out that every time you burn a lighter near you, you inhale like, 10 times more than you're ever supposed to in your life. We'll probably find something like that out someday. It can't be so good to have convenient fire. Like, fire that quickly means, like, you've got some funky gases that you're burning. You're burning some funky gases there.
-
Unknown B
Oh, horrible. I remember, like, laying a match and you get the ugly ass.
-
Unknown A
You know what's real bad?
-
Unknown B
What?
-
Unknown A
Scented candles. Scented candles apparently are not healthy. Jamie. Google that. Maybe I should say some scented candles. Maybe there's a way to do it organically. We should find out. That's true, too, because that would be a good thing to know, because I think there's some things in some scented candles that you're not supposed to inhale. And when you're a person that likes to have candles and who doesn't, they're cool. You want to have candles in your house. That's dope. Like, candlelight dinner with a bunch of friends is dope. Right? But I think it's the scented ones, the ones that are made from paraffin are the problem. It's a cheap byproduct primarily sourced from the refinement of petroleum. So you're burning petroleum. Paraffin is the most used candle wax worldwide, according to the National Candle association, the major Trade association representing U.S. candle manufacturers and their suppliers.
-
Unknown A
So it's all candles made from paraffin. However, few studies on candle emissions or their potential effects on human health exist, and conclusions from the research are mixed. There is no overall conclusion that paraffin candles will either. Excuse me. Either will or won't harm your health, says pulmonologist Dr. Sobia Farouk, a clinical assistant professor at the Cleveland Clinic Lerner College of Medicine. But the risk may also depend on various factors, including candle type and quality, how often and how long you're burning it, the airflow and the space where you're burning it, your health status, and more. Well, either it's not good for you or it's fine. It's. These are the options. And it seems to me like there's a little gaslighting going on here. Like how could it be good for you to have petroleum burning in your house? I want you to show me a study that, that's like tell to measure the fucking air in the room when you have three candles.
-
Unknown A
Measure the air in the room when you have four candles. Keep going. Tell me when I'm going to get lung cancer from this shit. Because.
-
Unknown B
Wow.
-
Unknown A
Yeah. Benzene, a known carcinogen, is another VOC released by paraffin candles. Hawk added. Long term exposure to this chemical has been linked to blood disorders such as leukemia. When inhaled, benzene can also be a respiratory irritant, which means it could probably. Yeah. Fuck.
-
Unknown B
Fuck.
-
Unknown A
So people think candles are cool.
-
Unknown B
It's like, oh man.
-
Unknown A
But what about. What is. What is a candle that you can use? Like can. There's got to be candles that are not bad.
-
Unknown B
I hope all those candle that I've got in a massage parlor were safe.
-
Unknown A
New candle. Oh. Now, candles made from soy wax, beeswax or steering coconut oil or animal fats are often considered healthier, but anything that is burned emits harmful particulates or chemicals. Evan said so. These candles also release VOCs into the air. It's just that paraffin wax is usually more polluting, according to.
-
Unknown B
Great.
-
Unknown A
So they all suck. The risk of toxic emissions is greater when candles are scented or dyed, which is another reason why paraffin free candles aren't immediately in the clear. This is because artificial fragrances have VOCs including phthalates, which have been linked to learning and behavior problems, obesity, impaired development of the reproductive systems and more. Evan said the unscented candle in the 2015 research also caused concerning concentrations of toxins, but had the lowest amount compared with. With its scented counterparts. Yeah, by what ratio? I wonder how much lower candle. Oh. The National Candle association maintains that candles are safe for use in the home. A spokesperson said in a statement. First of all, you can't totally say anything's safe because I, I was dating a girl once and she burnt her fucking house down with candles. That's exaggerating. She burnt a wall in her house.
-
Unknown B
What was she doing?
-
Unknown A
She just let her candles burn down and something caught fire and it like lit the side of her bedroom hall. Like her, her wall was on fire. She liked candles. So they're not totally safe. It's fire. Fire's not totally safe. Lighters aren't totally safe. You can't say it's safe like you Could. You could definitely do something stupid with it. Like, you know what's safe? Marshmallows. Marshmallows are safe. You light them, it's not good to eat. They're bad for your body. But they're fucking safe. They're not going to kill you unless.
-
Unknown B
You burn them to make s'mores with a lighter and a fork.
-
Unknown A
You know what's supposed to be really bad for you? Paper straws. Paper straws have those forever chemicals in them. See if that's true, otherwise we'll have to cut this out without getting sued by the paper straw industry. Oh, speaking of straws. Right. Everybody knows that paper straws came around because everybody saw that video of that turtle with that straw in his nose. That's the only reason why we started looking at paper straws different than everything else. Right?
-
Unknown B
Remember plastic.
-
Unknown A
Plastic.
-
Unknown B
Okay.
-
Unknown A
Plastic straws came about. What did I say? Paper, plastic straws came about because of that video of that turtle with the plastic straw on his nose. Right. Remember that?
-
Unknown B
Yeah. That was like, in their nose, right?
-
Unknown A
Yeah, Deep. Deep in the turtle's nose. New Studies found that 90% of paper straws tested contain forever chemicals, or PFAS, compared to 75% of plastic straws. So even plastic straws have those fucking chemicals in it. But it's even worse for you to use paper straws. Paper straws assessed by researchers at University of Antwerp, Belgium, were found to contain more forever chemicals per poly floral. How do you say that? Give it a shot, Philippe.
-
Unknown B
Polyfluoro.
-
Unknown A
Yeah. Substances or pfas is then plastic. But all of them are bad for you. What it's basically saying is that even straws. 75% of plastic straws have tested that they contain forever chemicals. That's not good. So all of it's bad. We should probably abandon the idea of straws.
-
Unknown B
I like McDonald's straws. The big fat one.
-
Unknown A
Here's what you don't want. A metal straw and a Stanley and then fall on your face.
-
Unknown B
Okay?
-
Unknown A
People have done that.
-
Unknown B
Idiots.
-
Unknown A
Well, listen, I've fallen. I know, but I've fallen before. No, I haven't. But I imagine, like, I would, you know. Just because you fall with a straw doesn't mean you're an idiot. But people got to be aware that that's basically a metal shank that's gonna go right through your face if you trip. You gotta carry that thing. If you're, like, clumsy, like as if you're carrying a knife, like, move it away from your body, you know, don't catch Your body with it. If you fall down and then stab yourself.
-
Unknown B
I know, man. You wouldn't let your baby hold that. Why are you holding it?
-
Unknown A
Yeah, yeah. Why are you holding that? You're not ready for that yet.
-
Unknown B
You ain't ready.
-
Unknown A
Well, especially if you're clumsy. Clumsy people should really know they're clumsy and be super careful with what they're carrying. Are you clumsy?
-
Unknown B
Yeah, man.
-
Unknown A
Don't carry a rake.
-
Unknown B
I was outside over there going, I was holding that baseball. And I'm thinking, holding that baseball. And I'm looking at the werewolf. I'm thinking, looking at my wife. I bet you I could throw a knuckleball and make it right in the fucking werewolf mouth. You don't fuck something up. Sit down.
-
Unknown A
Yeah, don't fuck up my werewolf, bro. That's one of my prized possessions. And even if you could hit it, what does that prove? Don't want to break the werewolf's teeth. What are you trying to prove, Felipe?
-
Unknown B
I still could throw a knuckleball.
-
Unknown A
Were you a good baseball player?
-
Unknown B
Hell, no.
-
Unknown A
No. But you had a good knuckleball or.
-
Unknown B
No, No, I was good at playing street ball with a tennis ball, and I could make. I had a good junk on a tennis ball that we would put over, like, a regular fastball.
-
Unknown A
Yeah.
-
Unknown B
And I have to make that shit, man. I was good, dude.
-
Unknown A
We used to play stickball in the street. That was fun. We were kids.
-
Unknown B
I don't get that game. I Wikipedia the other day to learn how to play because they're having like, a. A stickball tournament in New York last week when I was there. Yeah, that's the video I saw.
-
Unknown A
Yeah.
-
Unknown B
Yeah, they were having a tournament. All the veterans that used to play stickball New York showed up to play.
-
Unknown A
And these guys slid on the ground, bro.
-
Unknown B
But I never knew the game because in la, we play over the line.
-
Unknown A
That's a good way to get a staph infection.
-
Unknown B
Look at that.
-
Unknown A
Sliding on concrete. Good way. They're getting pumped. That looks like a guy who plays really good stickball.
-
Unknown B
Terror Squad.
-
Unknown A
Yeah, it's a city thing.
-
Unknown B
A broomstick. Right.
-
Unknown A
When I played it when I lived in Jamaica Plain, which little place outside of Boston, we played that. Used to play stickball on the street. People get mad at you. They hit their car with a tennis ball. It was stupid, but kids are just always looking for something to do. Back then. Now they're all online.
-
Unknown B
I used to play crazy games growing up, bro, that I'm pretty sure kids don't play that anymore. I used to play this game called huevos, which is called eggs. We used to put like a bunch of holes on the floor with your name on it. And then somebody will throw a tennis ball. And whoever the ball lands on that hole, that person has to grab that ball and fuck somebody up in the back before they can make it to the wall. And that person you hit has to grab that ball and then hit people on the way back before they get to the other side of the wall. And if you miss everybody, you get an egg on your little hole. And once you get four of them, we all take turns fucking you up with a tennis ball while you're this standard at this.
-
Unknown A
Jesus Christ.
-
Unknown B
Yeah, there was no cable back then, and we didn't want to join gangs.
-
Unknown A
I think you did.
-
Unknown B
And we don't want to read.
-
Unknown A
I think you guys had a softcore gang.
-
Unknown B
We didn't have no boy Scouts.
-
Unknown A
That's a crazy way to make friends.
-
Unknown B
And we played suicide, though.
-
Unknown A
I don't remember. How's it go?
-
Unknown B
It's a handball court, a wall. And you throw a ball and there's five kids and you catch it. But if you miss it, everybody starts you up. No, never play until you make it to the wall.
-
Unknown A
No, I never play suicide. Never play.
-
Unknown B
I will tell you. Everybody stand by the wall and you throw the ball against the wall. You try to catch it, and if you miss, they jump you till you get to the wall with the ball.
-
Unknown A
That.
-
Unknown B
That's how I. Oh, my God.
-
Unknown A
Oh, my God. Requires at least two players. Could have as many as can be accommodated by the playing area. This is funny. When they take a game like this and they break it down like, these are the rules.
-
Unknown C
We did play wall ball. We did. We called it wall ball.
-
Unknown B
You call.
-
Unknown A
Did you do like that?
-
Unknown C
It was. Honestly. I said if you. If you up, you'd have to stand on the wall. People could throw the ball.
-
Unknown B
There it is right there. They're fucking them up.
-
Unknown A
They're open until the player touches the wall. They're open to be pegged. Struck hard with a thrown ball by the player who caught it. If a player become. Comes into contact with the ball but fails to catch it, they are also open to be pegged.
-
Unknown C
I mean, that's what it was.
-
Unknown A
It's a tough word to use.
-
Unknown C
That's what it is.
-
Unknown A
Getting hit by a tennis ball is a good thing to get hit by though, right? It sucks. Like, if someone's throwing it, it sucks, but it's not going to kill you.
-
Unknown B
There's Always this asshole kid that didn't like that kid that was going to get hit, and he'll put that ball in a shitload of water and mud.
-
Unknown A
Oh, that's a problem. He's cheating. He can't cheat.
-
Unknown B
Oh, also, remember, if that person that put the gate hit by the ball runs home, we'll. We'll chase him home, bro. Beat him up in front of his mom.
-
Unknown A
Boy, that's why cable's important. Yes, that's why the Internet's important. YouTube. We gotta keep people pacified.
-
Unknown B
TikTok saved your life.
-
Unknown A
Imagine if it did. Imagine if it saved a few lives. People just at home scrolling instead of out. Gang banging, you know? I mean, everybody gets addicted to it. If you just don't go out and do terrible things because you just scroll and stare at your TikTok.
-
Unknown B
I know, man. I don't know if kids still shoplift for fun.
-
Unknown A
I bet they do. You know, there's been, like, famous people that have been caught shoplifting. I think a lot of people shop when you're little. I did.
-
Unknown B
You were hungry.
-
Unknown A
I got. No, no, no. I was just dumb and young and I got caught.
-
Unknown B
You don't do it now, right? No. You see opportunity?
-
Unknown A
No, no, no. I did it like a couple times ever. It was like candy bars. And when I was. I was just hanging around with a bunch of bad kids and we would do that. We would go those. Like. It was a thrill. You'd go to a store and steal something. And I think we probably did it two or three times, and I got caught.
-
Unknown B
I don't do it anymore. But sometimes.
-
Unknown A
So stupid.
-
Unknown B
I know. But sometimes I'm walking around and I see like. Like a pack of donuts. But they're far from where the donuts are, right? Like, they're by the shoe and they're open, and I'm like. I'm all high looking at the donut. Like, damn, you're lost.
-
Unknown A
Joey Diaz used to swipe lighters from 711 just to stay sharp. Even when he had money, he would swipe lighters just to stay on his toes. How you doing, brother?
-
Unknown B
I saw him. I saw him do that while he's talking to the guy and he put his Snickers.
-
Unknown A
Yeah, he's got some hand movements to distract you.
-
Unknown B
I think that was a game, man, that road comedies would do, bro. On the way to a gig, who could shoplift the most shit out of the gas station?
-
Unknown A
That's not good for our reputation. That's not good for our reputation. But you get power Bars, traveling entertainers. You get power bars, gas station food. Man, those. Those times when you're on the road and all you're eating is garbage.
-
Unknown B
Hell, yeah, man. You gotta buy a grilled cheese there and put pork rinds in it from the package.
-
Unknown A
You gotta take a chance with the bean and cheese burrito that you microwave. You have to, like, open that strip of plastic.
-
Unknown B
Those were good, though.
-
Unknown A
When you were hungry.
-
Unknown B
Ramonas.
-
Unknown A
Every now and then you got, like, good food at a gas station. You're like, why doesn't everybody do this? Like, sometimes you go to a gas station, it's like a gas station, but it's also like a fried chicken spot. Fried chicken cheeseburgers. You're like, damn those Cheese. That looks like a legit cheeseburger.
-
Unknown B
Okay, where am I? This place is dangerous here.
-
Unknown A
I mean, you would make more money, right? That's what Bucky's figured out. Whatever the you want, we gotta do. We got barbecue pickled dicks. Let's go. We got eggs, cheese, milk. You could buy a house. You could buy a sled. What do you need, fishing poles?
-
Unknown B
Would you need a. You need a hamburger? What else?
-
Unknown A
Yeti cooler and a Traeger grill. We got those.
-
Unknown B
We got a shower in a bag if you want to shower.
-
Unknown C
They're making a Disney Buc EE's and it's gonna have rides.
-
Unknown A
You know, there's a lawsuit going on with BUC EE's. There's a. They're claiming that these people copied their logo.
-
Unknown C
Which one?
-
Unknown B
The Chucky's?
-
Unknown A
No, there's another spot that has, like, another kind of an animal.
-
Unknown C
Yeah, they do that with all that's knockout. They knock off and that. Wherever that is. They knock off all sorts of stores. I'll try to find that.
-
Unknown A
Is it another country?
-
Unknown C
Yeah, I think so.
-
Unknown A
Oh, I thought it was in America.
-
Unknown C
Yeah, it's in Mexico.
-
Unknown A
Oh, interesting. Oh, Mexico loves to do that. No, no, no, I've seen that. That's not it, though. That's the. That's the fake Buc EE's in Mexico. Put that picture up again.
-
Unknown B
Put that picture up. Oh, my God. So there's a fake in and out in Mexico too.
-
Unknown A
Oh, that's so funny, man.
-
Unknown B
And there's a fake in and out in California.
-
Unknown A
I've seen the fake in and out in Mexico. There's a fake one in California.
-
Unknown B
Yeah, it's called Easy Takeout. And I think they used to be same. Same uniforms, same stand, same burgers. But they just added a breakfast burger. It's called Easy takeout in West Covina.
-
Unknown A
Wow. So they copied the. The logo.
-
Unknown C
It's very similar here. This is what the lawsuit is about. Same city, Tempo Lupus. Mexico.
-
Unknown A
Oh, yeah. They even got a little gap in between it. Bucky's knockout. Lucky spotted.
-
Unknown B
He's lucky to have two teeth.
-
Unknown A
But that's the one in Mexico. Right, Jamie?
-
Unknown C
But they both. I told you, they're both.
-
Unknown A
But I don't think this other one in Mexico. I might be wrong.
-
Unknown C
Month ago, two months ago, Bucky taking legal action against Mexican.
-
Unknown B
Shut up.
-
Unknown C
I. Like I was looking a little.
-
Unknown A
Okay, well, what was that animal? That was like a he. The buc ees is a. Right. So what was that other animal? Was the Lucky? Who's lucky? Is Lucky a rabbit? Like what is Lucky?
-
Unknown C
Lucky is also a beaver.
-
Unknown B
Okay. Oh, my God. He has a pompadour, though.
-
Unknown A
Let me see. Where's Lucky's? What a bunch of dumbasses. Oh, my God. It is a beaver. What is it? Oh, it's a raccoon. Oh, okay. No, you can't do that.
-
Unknown B
Get a mask, man. He's a bandito.
-
Unknown A
Why can't you do that, though? Why can't you have Harry's or how about George's and have Curious George? They could, you know, get together a little franchise. Curious George. Everybody loves Curious George. Would that be okay, like, if they have George's or would they get sued?
-
Unknown B
Or Enrique.
-
Unknown C
A different lawsuit.
-
Unknown A
See, there is a different lawsuit.
-
Unknown C
Super Fuels trademark infringement.
-
Unknown A
Because you imagine if like, the owners. Whoever owns the. The.
-
Unknown C
Yeah, this is even. This is a little.
-
Unknown B
Whoa.
-
Unknown C
Because it's like.
-
Unknown A
That's the one I saw Super Fuels.
-
Unknown B
So there's.
-
Unknown A
It's just. They're saying it's because it's got a smiling animal and the red hat. See, I don't know. I'm not on board with that one.
-
Unknown C
I'm trying to see what they're trying to.
-
Unknown A
I'm not on board with that one. I can't think that you could own the idea of having any kind of cute animal as a part of your logo. That seems kind of ridiculous. I don't understand copyright law, but doesn't that seem like a little ridiculous to you?
-
Unknown B
Yeah.
-
Unknown A
What if it's a cat and you make it kitties and you have a cute little cat. Are you telling me that I can't make a business called kitties?
-
Unknown C
That depends where you're doing business at and how much of a copyright you have. Kind of like, is it nationwide? Did you have an international copyright, which is really tough.
-
Unknown A
Right, but is that a copyright infringement if you have kitties?
-
Unknown C
It depends. On what?
-
Unknown A
If you're not saying, imagine someone has a copyright to the ability. I don't understand any of this stuff, so clearly I'm talking out of my ass. But imagine if somebody has a copyright to just owning the ability to use a cartoon character in your logo. That seems completely insane, doesn't it?
-
Unknown B
Yeah, but what's his name? There's a comedy club and Tommy T's. He used to have the Lauren Hardy. The. The what you call it the Lauren Hardy logos.
-
Unknown A
Lauren Hardy.
-
Unknown B
Yeah, yeah. And for his comedy club and he got. He got a sued by Bozo the Clown. He owned.
-
Unknown A
The Bozo owned Laurel and Hardy.
-
Unknown B
Yeah, the cartoon. Any. Anything that you put cartoon on it with Laurel Hardy's face.
-
Unknown A
Imagine going back watching Laurel Hardy. Imagine showing somebody that had no idea about American culture at all. Yes, going back and you show them Laurel Hardy. And then right after you show them Chappelle's show, when Dave plays the blind white supremacist. Yes, black.
-
Unknown B
Yeah, that guy.
-
Unknown A
But imagine, imagine seeing like what. This is what comedy started out as. And this is comedy later. That is a wild ride.
-
Unknown B
Yes, man.
-
Unknown A
That's a wild ride. The ride from like Abbott and Costello.
-
Unknown B
Yes.
-
Unknown A
Who's on first?
-
Unknown B
Who's on for? Eddie Kantor, bro. Eddie Cantor was the first comedian to do radio and he was. Because I have a History for Fools podcast. So I learned about the. The history of stand up comedy. Plus I read that. What? The documentary. But he was one of the first guy. But he was, he was very clean, bro. He sang and can we hear some of this?
-
Unknown A
Here's some of this.
-
Unknown B
He was getting paid $500 for five minute shows on radio. Yeah, he can. He was the first right guy to have a radio comedy show.
-
Unknown A
What is it? I'm trying to hear what he's saying. What is he saying?
-
Unknown B
He's singing some V nonsense. A clever girl will want to know.
-
Unknown A
If you mean who wed. The dumb ones never think of looking that far ahead.
-
Unknown B
And by the dumbler they come, the.
-
Unknown A
Better I like them. Cuz the dumb ones know how to make love. The dumb ones know how to make love?
-
Unknown B
Yeah.
-
Unknown A
Jesus Christ. The dumb ones know how to make love. That sounds like something Theo would say on stage.
-
Unknown B
And I like him dumb. He'll be on the radio, bro, talking and then he'll pinch the chicks in their butts.
-
Unknown A
Oh God, yeah.
-
Unknown B
And then like they wouldn't say nothing. And finally a woman said something. Mr. Cantor and he had a fire.
-
Unknown A
Well, you gotta remember like people back then were basically barbarians.
-
Unknown B
Yes.
-
Unknown A
1920S people, bro.
-
Unknown B
Back then it was World War I, bro. Back then for a stand up comedian. Like when I found out was imagine you do a gig 200 back then, right. And the promoter says, no, I'm not gonna. The gangsters, I'm not gonna pay you. And as you don't get paid and they'll call the cops, you have a couple of three vagrants walking around downtown and then you're three comedians walking around town with no hotel.
-
Unknown A
Yeah.
-
Unknown B
No pay. And they're gonna pick you up for being a hobo now.
-
Unknown A
Yeah. You could get stiffed for sure.
-
Unknown B
But that was back then, brother. The hard time. Imagine from then to now.
-
Unknown A
Well, I think there's probably still a lot of shit out there for a lot of guys that are coming up. But it's just now there's more. Real gigs.
-
Unknown B
Yeah. Better gigs.
-
Unknown A
Well, it's. Comedy's more accessible, you know, because of YouTube and everything. Comedy's just way. It's everywhere, you know. You're special. Wow. Tell everybody.
-
Unknown B
Oh, I'm a special right now.
-
Unknown A
What a segue.
-
Unknown B
Yeah, I'm a special right now. On Netflix. Raging fool, we shot at the Chris Theater in Sacramento, two shows. My wife directed it and executive produced. She executive produced all my specials. But we shot it with our own money and we paid everybody and then we. We sold it to Netflix. We made like a two year deal.
-
Unknown A
Oh, that's awesome.
-
Unknown B
So we own Great.
-
Unknown A
I like the. Love the tracksuit.
-
Unknown B
Yes. Cuz. I. Raging Bull. Cuz. Raging Fool. Raging Bull.
-
Unknown A
I love the tracksuit. It's dope.
-
Unknown B
Cuz I was watching that movie Raging Bull.
-
Unknown A
Yeah.
-
Unknown B
And I was thinking that when Jake LaMotta had nothing left to do in his life, he had nothing how to make money.
-
Unknown A
Right.
-
Unknown B
He said, you know what? I'm going to be a comedian. So. And I thought like, wow. He had nothing else to do with his life. So he figured out, I'm gonna do stand up comedy. Because that was the last thing. And for us it's like the first thing.
-
Unknown A
Well, that happens with actors sometimes too. And their careers kind of dwindle. They start doing stand up. That happens.
-
Unknown B
And he had like when he would do. You saw the movie Ride Raging Bull, when he's doing stand up and he's at the. He's at a bar called Jimmy's Corner Bar. And that bar is still there.
-
Unknown A
You know, Stanhope was friends with him.
-
Unknown B
Really?
-
Unknown A
Yeah. Cause the guy, that guy lived down In Arizona, where Stanhope lived.
-
Unknown B
Oh, I. That's cool, man.
-
Unknown A
Yeah, he's like. Got photos of him hanging out over his house and. Yeah, yeah. Jake Lamonta was Stanhope's boy. That's a real story, man. Jake lamotto was a character. Yeah, that was a wild fella. A wild, crazy fella. And God damn, Robert De Niro narrow. Nailed it.
-
Unknown B
Nailed it, huh?
-
Unknown A
Nailed it. I mean, nailed it. Like, he looked like an animal when he was Jake Lamana. Like the younger Jake Lamana.
-
Unknown B
Did you fuck my wife?
-
Unknown A
Yeah. Oh, Jesus Christ. He was so scary. He was so scary because he was just out of his fucking mind and so dangerous. And it was based on a real guy, man. I mean, the. The movie is real close to how that guy was Jake LaMotta when he was in his prime. He was a fucking monster, man.
-
Unknown B
I like when he looked at his hands and he goes. He don't like his hands because they're not big, I guess. He goes, I can never be a heavyweight.
-
Unknown A
Yeah. Yeah. Isn't that crazy?
-
Unknown B
Crazy.
-
Unknown A
That's crazy. That's a different kind of human, man. And back then, there was a lot of people like that. This is. You got to go back and put your mind into what it must have been like to be Jake LaMotta growing up. And like, what. So what. What year was Jake in his prime? What year did he fight Sugar Ray Robinson? Let's ask that. Jake Lamonta versus Sugar Ray Robinson.
-
Unknown B
62, 59, 44.
-
Unknown A
42. Okay. Madison Square Garden, 1942. So you gotta imagine. Wow. You gotta just put your mind into the type of people that lived back then. I mean, like, cars were new, sewage was new. Like, people had been coming over in boats. Criminals were everywhere. Crime was everywhere. Organized crime was the. The rule of the law in all the Italian communities, the Irish communities, you know, that was the thing.
-
Unknown B
42.
-
Unknown A
Yeah. This was just United States. It's like. You ever watch that movie Gangs of New York?
-
Unknown B
Yes.
-
Unknown A
Fucking great movie, right? That's a fucking great movie. And probably pretty accurate. Yes, roughly, pretty accurate. The way life was back then.
-
Unknown B
Some of those gangster that were in that movie were actually real people.
-
Unknown A
I believe it.
-
Unknown B
Like that woman in that movie. I think you talked about it. The one they used to collect ears and put them in a jar. Yeah, yeah. She was an actual. A real person. She had a bar where people. Where people would just put. Have a jar full of pickled ears and noses from previous fights.
-
Unknown A
Oh, my God. Jesus.
-
Unknown B
And they'll have fights in the back with A mountain goose fighting a dog.
-
Unknown A
Oh my God. Gangs of New York, man, that movie is so. Because we don't think of New York that way. You think of New York as like New York City. Well, it was kind of dangerous in the 70s, then, you know, Giuliani cleaned it up and then, you know, it's pretty commercialized in a lot of ways, but still a beautiful city. But New York during the time of that, whenever that film was supposed to represent was a wild, crazy, almost like Wild west type place. Like we think of, while we think of those kind of scenes. When you think of a wild west movie. Right, right.
-
Unknown B
You think, yeah, the Goodbye and the Ugly. Yeah.
-
Unknown A
You think of people getting stabbed and shot. But that was happening over there too. It's not like it never happened on the east coast. And they only did it on the.
-
Unknown B
West coast on people.
-
Unknown A
It was happening in the whole country.
-
Unknown B
The whole.
-
Unknown A
And they, they had just gotten. I mean these people just gotten done with a fucking civil war. Right?
-
Unknown B
Yeah.
-
Unknown A
Cuz back then you got to think 1940, you go to like the 1860s to the 1940s. That's not that much time.
-
Unknown B
No, that's pretty quick.
-
Unknown A
That's 80 years.
-
Unknown B
80 years.
-
Unknown A
A lot of those are still alive.
-
Unknown B
Yeah, Same mentality, same crazy.
-
Unknown A
And then you got more immigrants coming in on boats. No YouTube to watch, just a women of prayer. Someone told them to come.
-
Unknown B
I always think about that, man. Like when the.
-
Unknown A
When Jesus.
-
Unknown B
I was that her.
-
Unknown C
She supposedly was real.
-
Unknown B
She was Maggie. Hellcat Maggie.
-
Unknown A
Jesus.
-
Unknown B
I think about the. When the, the Irish are coming in at the same time when that, that movie happening. And they told him, you want a free meal, you want to fight for your country? And they give them a uniform and their families go off to New York and they go off to fight the South.
-
Unknown A
Jesus Christ.
-
Unknown B
Just imagine coming out of the boat and someone just hands you a gun and a piece of bread and go, go fight for America. And I think about that like, why are some hardcore people right there, man?
-
Unknown A
You want. Yeah, yeah, yeah.
-
Unknown B
Hardcore people and different times, man.
-
Unknown A
Desperate.
-
Unknown B
Yeah. Then people look old, older than. And they do now.
-
Unknown A
Oh yeah, they look old quick.
-
Unknown B
Yeah. Like you look at a person's photo and you go, how old is that kid? He looked like 70, I thought. 25 year old kid working in a coal mine.
-
Unknown A
Yeah, working in coal mines. Those people all got sick, they all got fucked up. I mean that's environmental pollution that you're signing up for. Like you're gonna go breathe cold dust no matter what. Everyone gets they all get horrible. That. What is that? Black lung.
-
Unknown B
Black lung.
-
Unknown A
That's terrifying. Terrifying. And then you've got people that just live around coal plants and they're breeding that shit and they don't even. They're even a part of that business.
-
Unknown B
I know, man. Like Wilkes Bar, Pennsylvania, bro.
-
Unknown A
There's a place that we showed a video once. It was. Was it Indiana, Jamie? Yeah. Yeah. So there's like three coal plants near this city. And these people, they can wipe their windshield and they have black soot on their fingers.
-
Unknown B
It just falls.
-
Unknown A
Yeah, it's in America. So these people are for sure breeding that in for the.
-
Unknown B
Pittsburgh.
-
Unknown A
Indiana.
-
Unknown B
Indiana.
-
Unknown A
Yeah. That's scary. That's scary. And. And that's a fraction of what's going on in China, bro.
-
Unknown B
Oh yeah. Cuz when I was. I was in. I was in Seattle and I was waiting. I was crossing the. Waiting for the car to pass. I was going to my show and I saw it was like a two a mile train and it was all coal. Coal, real black coal coming from Minnesota. And I asked the cop that was standing there, I go, I didn't know we still mine coal. And he goes, well, we don't use it, but it's all going to China.
-
Unknown A
Really?
-
Unknown B
Yeah. Like it was like a mile, bro. Of coal and. And it had no cover on it.
-
Unknown A
That's crazy.
-
Unknown B
And it was just falling. They say that. I don't know how much coal flies. I don't know about coal, but I just know what the guy told me. That was a mile train of coal coming from Minnesota on that one line. And there was a boat. I can see the boat where. Where it was going.
-
Unknown A
Wow. And it's all going to China.
-
Unknown B
Yeah. Yeah.
-
Unknown A
They're full steam ahead with coal. Hey, someone should check to see if maybe they know something we don't.
-
Unknown B
I know, man. What are they producing with that coal?
-
Unknown A
They're doing a lot. I mean, they produce so many of the things that we need, which is one of the craziest things we all found out when everything got locked down, is you couldn't get anything because so much of what you wanted was made in China, like oh my God. Or made in Russia or made in anywhere where they had to come in on a ship. You know, like that became a real problem.
-
Unknown B
I thought it was made in Akron, Ohio.
-
Unknown A
Yeah, they hardly make here in comparison to what we consume. We consume way more probably, I would guess, than any country of a similar size. And yo dog, still rocking the Samsung. I love it. I love when a Comic holds out and doesn't go iPhone.
-
Unknown B
Oh, no, man. I like the bigger phone and a little pen.
-
Unknown A
You like the pen?
-
Unknown B
I love the pen.
-
Unknown A
You're one of those guys. Which one? Is that the. Is that the S24?
-
Unknown B
Yeah, that one that was 24 Ultra.
-
Unknown A
Yeah. Is that the newest one or the one right before it?
-
Unknown B
Right before it.
-
Unknown A
There's a new one that just came out. It's pretty dope.
-
Unknown B
A year and a half ago, I think.
-
Unknown A
No, yeah, that's the old one. That's the S24 Ultra. I have that one. That one's sick. It does a lot of cool shit.
-
Unknown B
Good videos, right?
-
Unknown A
Yeah, it's great. Great at a lot of stuff. But what the interesting thing is the AI. So what I like about it is I can go to a website, and if I open it up in the Samsung browser, and then I can say summarize and it'll summarize the website for me.
-
Unknown B
Oh, they didn't know that.
-
Unknown A
Yeah. So if there's something that's taking forever for you to get to the point because you want me to keep scrolling and scrolling and scrolling and scrolling and scrolling while you show ads all over the place, that's a trap. So it'll just tell you, oh, there's an asteroid that might hit Earth within the next, you know, fucking 60 years. Like, oh, great, there's a 3%. What is a percent chance? The 1.5 today, thank God. Usually only 1.5%, I think.
-
Unknown B
I think a picture is like, I could take a picture of you, right? And then do that one screen.
-
Unknown A
Yeah.
-
Unknown B
And then I circle it and it'll find a sweater for me.
-
Unknown A
That's cool. Yeah, that's really cool. That's. I think that's available on all phones now. I think the new iPhone update has that as well, where you can Google search a thing and it'll show you where to buy it.
-
Unknown B
That's what my. My wife always wanted. She wanted, like, to have it where you watching television and you pause it with your finger and make a circle and then it just shifts to your house.
-
Unknown A
You know when people are gonna be fed up with that thing, when first of all, you can only buy so much shit. But second of all, like, what. What happens? Like, you know those. Those glasses that they wear now, those meta glasses? Have you seen this Harvard kid?
-
Unknown B
Oh, the one that you could record now? Yeah, I've seen those.
-
Unknown A
Some Harvard kid figured out how to use facial recognition software with that. So he sees you, gets a photo of you immediately gets a Wikipedia on you, or whatever the fuck is available online, sees your Instagram page, finds your address, and it was wild. You're like, wait, hit the brakes.
-
Unknown B
Sound like the T1000 Terminator.
-
Unknown A
Yeah, it's like, hit the brakes, hit the brakes. But I don't think they can.
-
Unknown B
Was there a movie like that?
-
Unknown A
Yeah, there's been a bunch of movies.
-
Unknown B
Roddy Piper was like that.
-
Unknown A
Oh, they live glasses. Yes.
-
Unknown B
Right, right.
-
Unknown A
That was aliens.
-
Unknown B
I think about that sometimes when you have a guest and go, wait a minute, he's talking about those glasses from Roddy Piper.
-
Unknown A
Similar. I think the Roddy Piper glasses. You put them on, you could see what everybody really looked like. You could see through the whatever energy field they were projecting. There's these alien creatures that were pretending to be people, and there's a lot of people that believe that. Now I'm less inclined to believe that, but I'm open. Wouldn't want to get tricked. I mean, if there really are people that are actually aliens that are amongst us, that look like people and behave like people, I actually. This is the guy who figured it out. Try to say his name. Felipe. Hit me with it.
-
Unknown B
I agree.
-
Unknown A
What's the first one right there. Try that.
-
Unknown B
Oh, it's as Anfu. Nguyen.
-
Unknown A
I think Kn.
-
Unknown B
Ardolo.
-
Unknown A
I don't think they say Nui. I think they say Gwen. Right. There's been a few fighters in the ufc, Vietnamese fighters, that have that same spelling. And I think they say it as. Can you find out how they say it, Jamie?
-
Unknown B
So it's Anfu. Gwyn. Okay, I can see it. Little Dutch there.
-
Unknown A
And cane. RDFio. Artifio. Artifio. So they figured out how to do this.
-
Unknown B
Making up names now?
-
Unknown A
No, this is a real name.
-
Unknown C
Anybody can do it.
-
Unknown B
My name is.
-
Unknown A
But can you scroll? So we can explain how it's possible to do it today? How to remove your information. Oh, geez.
-
Unknown C
Literally, like instructions.
-
Unknown A
So just showing how to remove your face from face search engines, which you're not going to be able to do eventually. It's getting weird out there.
-
Unknown B
A black face, green face, bro.
-
Unknown A
I had a friend of mine who came in here the other day, and he. He's down to a flip phone. And his flip phone was interesting because it has Android on it. His flip phone, you could actually get text messages on it. And you have a little tiny ass screen on the flip phone where you can kind of clumsily type your way through a sentence so you don't have to do it with, like, a full keyboard. Like an iPhone or your phone. But you also, it's inconvenient. So you don't text as much. You don't go on these long winded diatribes like a lot of people do. You just real simple, the whole screen.
-
Unknown B
Is on there, but you gotta navigate all the way around to read everything. Yeah, I remember those.
-
Unknown A
It's a tiny little ass screen.
-
Unknown B
Yeah.
-
Unknown A
It's got regular buttons to make phone calls. And then on his little tiny ass screen is a tiny ass keyboard, about that big. And you get in there with that tiny ass keyboard and you try to type a text message and you could push send. And so it's inconvenient. So you don't go on Twitter, you don't check things out, you just get your text messages. It can do other stuff if you absolutely fucking need it to, but live your life, bitch. And he was in here with that. I was like, man, that seems cool. But I like watching YouTube on my phone, so I don't know what to tell you.
-
Unknown B
That sounds like the Larry Bubbles Brown from San Francisco. Yeah, he still has a flip phone.
-
Unknown A
David Tell. Wow, David Tell has a flip phone. Yeah, you should see him.
-
Unknown B
Text messages, do they both have the original phone numbers when you first met them?
-
Unknown A
No, no, they've all changed numbers. You have to change every now and then. It's, you know, you gotta purge, gotta keep moving.
-
Unknown B
I think I said I still have my same phone number for the last 20 years.
-
Unknown A
Damn. One of those dudes a holdout. Yeah, yeah, sometimes that's good. But it gets annoying sometimes. You know, it's all in, you gotta.
-
Unknown B
Manage, you change your phone number a lot.
-
Unknown A
Nice people, you gotta manage your time. You know, like in. The thing about a guy like you is like you're headlining, you're on the road, dudes want to open up for you, you get the Netflix special, they want to hang out with you. It's like you got to manage your time because you can't give your time away to everybody. Like there's a certain amount of time you need for yourself. If you don't have that time and need yourself, you go off the rails. Yeah, you gotta, you gotta take time to re center all the time, all the time. And if you're constantly getting this and that, you're constantly interacting, you're never alone, you never fighting with people. Yeah, I'd like, I get in a sauna and I stretch out. Every day I get down there, I stretch everything out. When you're doing that, you can't do anything else.
-
Unknown A
You can't be scrolling on tick tock when you. You gotta just go through your routine and then that clears my mind. And I feel like if you don't make room for that, you're gonna fuck your life up. And I know that there's only so many people that I can entertain and help with stuff. There's only so many. There's so many people that are just. It's a transactional kind of a conversation you're having with them. It's not fun. It's not like, what's up, dude? Hey, what's up? Those are great. Yeah, but then there's a lot of. Could you do this? Would you do that? Will you fly to here and do like, hey, enough. You know? So you gotta like, know when to.
-
Unknown B
Change number, what time you get up.
-
Unknown A
It depends. Most days, eight. I was up at eight.
-
Unknown B
Eight is good. I'll tell you. I'll tell you the story. Like, bro, I get about five every day.
-
Unknown A
Yeah, I don't think that's necessary. It's the thing like people always want to do where they want to show themselves that they have the discipline to get up. I respect that. Like Jocko does that. You know Jocko Willink? No, no, he is. Jocko is. He's amazing, dude. He's a former Navy SEAL who is one of the most inspirational guys I know. And he writes books on leadership. Just brilliant guy. Has an excellent podcast. Solid dude, Brazilian jiu jitsu black belt. And he like every morning he takes a photo of his watch. It says 4:30am I seen that guy. This is every morning when he's waking up, you get his shitty iron man. I shouldn't say shitty because they're fucking durable as fuck. Iron man triathlon watches. Oh, it looks like you got a new watch. That's a new watch, Jocko. You can't fool me. I know your old watch.
-
Unknown A
Go back to the old watch pictures.
-
Unknown B
Look.
-
Unknown A
So it's every day, 4:30, his watch, sometimes 4:14, takes a photo of it and then he works out. He's just a legit dude.
-
Unknown B
Wow, that's dedication.
-
Unknown A
So that's him though. He likes doing that. He likes doing that. But he's not a comedian, you know, I'm saying, I think like for a comedian, you can't be that rigid. You'll get a little psychotic. You can't be that rich. You gotta have discipline, but you also gotta have fun. You gotta. So I don't get up at 4:30. Fuck out of here. First of all, I'm up Until at least midnight almost every night.
-
Unknown B
Me too.
-
Unknown A
I get, like most of my best, like, writing done and my best ideas when everyone in the house is asleep. So when everyone in my house is asleep and I'm up, I like that because I'm like, cool, everybody, I don't need. Nobody needs my attention now. I can concentrate and I get my. I can't concentrate when people are in the house. I feel like I should be hanging out and having fun and being with everybody. I don't want to lock myself up in my office, but that's the only way to write. But though, for me, it's like late at night is where it's at because everybody's asleep and the world feels creepy, you know, at night the world feels kind of dangerous and fucked up and stupid. It's like, you know, you. When you worry about war in the middle of the night, it's like 1:00 in the morning in front of your computer, you're writing something on Microsoft Word.
-
Unknown A
You're genuinely worried about war.
-
Unknown B
Yeah.
-
Unknown A
Genuinely worried that decisions that people are making in this country are going to one day come down on us with holy terror. One day, just in the middle of the city, just boom. Some thermonuclear device that levels a place four times the size of Hiroshima instantaneously. I think about that kind of shit late at night.
-
Unknown B
You knew, right? How do you make that funny?
-
Unknown A
I don't sometimes. Some of it's not funny.
-
Unknown B
But you.
-
Unknown A
There's funny things attached to it. There's funny things attached to just the way we behave. It's not really. There's nothing funny about the potential for complete annihilation of the human race. But there is something funny about this desire that we have to keep doing the same things we've always done and hope that somehow or another we get it right this time.
-
Unknown B
Yeah.
-
Unknown A
And we're on the verge of war all the time. And there's got to be some way to stop that other than funding more war. There's got to be a better way to stop it.
-
Unknown B
That's funny. You said the verge of war and when you first started doing stand up comedy. How many. There's been a lot of versions of real wars, huh?
-
Unknown A
Yeah. The first war, when I was. So when was Desert Storm? Was that. Which one was which? We had this conversation the other day.
-
Unknown B
Shield was with Norman Schwarzkopf.
-
Unknown A
That's Iraq. And that's like 2003.
-
Unknown B
Yeah, right.
-
Unknown A
The one I'm talking about is Desert Storm, which was like 1990. Was it 1990, Jamie.
-
Unknown C
That says they're not the exact same, but it says they're the same, so.
-
Unknown B
They'Re the same phases.
-
Unknown A
Yeah, but the first invasion, before we pulled out with George W. Bush in Iraq.
-
Unknown C
Iraq evaded Kuwait on August 20, 1990.
-
Unknown B
Yes, I remember that one. Yes.
-
Unknown A
Okay, so when Iraq invaded Kuwait in 1990, then we went to war with Iraq, and I was living with my friend Jimmy, and we were sitting. Jimmy Ditilio. Shout out to Jimmy. We were sitting in our apartment in the living room, and the war was on tv. And we're like, holy shit, man. We're at war. I remember thinking, this can't even be real.
-
Unknown B
It just happened at night, right? We started watching those. The air raids.
-
Unknown A
Yeah.
-
Unknown C
It started as Desert Shield. And then. Then when we started going after, like, Ham was Desert Storm.
-
Unknown B
Yeah.
-
Unknown A
And what year was that?
-
Unknown C
90. That was just like a year later. It was 91.
-
Unknown A
So Desert Shield was to protect, and Desert Storm was to destroy.
-
Unknown C
It was dropping off.
-
Unknown A
Bill Hicks had the best material about that. Oh, my God, his material. But the war is great. They have such sophisticated weapons. How do you know? We got the receipts. We love to arm puppet dictators and then fuck them up. You know, it's like, you know, it's like Clint Eastwood movie. Pick up the gun. You know, it's like Dirty Harry.
-
Unknown B
I tell you. I know you're thinking, yeah, fire four.
-
Unknown A
Or tell you the truth, I kind of forgot myself.
-
Unknown B
My favorite one is the Unforgiven Man. When that guy is crying, could he kill somebody? He goes, that's what happens when you kill a man. You take away all he ever wanted and all he ever had.
-
Unknown A
Yeah, that movie was the best Western movie I think, ever, like, of that kind of Clint Eastwood genre. That was almost like he was coming back to updated, you know, because he had all the bangers, you know, good, the bad and the ugly. A Fistful of Dollars, like, incredible.
-
Unknown B
Josie Wells.
-
Unknown A
Yeah. Oh, Outlaw Josie Wells was. That was another level, too. But then it's like Unforgiven was the one where it, like, really gave you a sense of what it must have been like living in the Wild West. It was just. The people were more real.
-
Unknown B
Yeah, it was like.
-
Unknown A
It was more updated to, like, the movies of that era. Like the Morgan Freeman character. It was a fucking great movie, man. That's a great, like, western movie and just a hard story, man.
-
Unknown B
I like that line when they. When he goes in there to get those people that kill Morgan Freeman. You just shot an unknown man.
-
Unknown A
Yeah.
-
Unknown B
He should have armed himself if he's gonna decorate his place with a friend of mine.
-
Unknown A
Yeah, that was a hardcore movie, man. That was a hardcore movie.
-
Unknown B
You saw the. The.
-
Unknown A
But isn't it funny that we always want to think about that kind of shit happening out west? We don't want to believe that that kind of same shit was happening out east.
-
Unknown B
Yeah.
-
Unknown A
Animals everywhere. Animals. Animals. People were animals back then. They were barely human.
-
Unknown B
Hang them high.
-
Unknown A
Can you imagine if we had to do fucking stand up in 1820? You imagine, first of all, you're getting sick everywhere because there's no sewage. So everybody's just got shit in the streets. Everywhere you go, you're breathing shit fumes. You're stepping in shit everywhere.
-
Unknown B
That's what I think about now when I watch those movies now. Like gangs in New York. Yeah, I would. I looked over somebody, man. It stinks. Oh, there. People are, like, ignoring the fucking stink. There's a rotting body right there, bro.
-
Unknown A
It probably was so rank. They didn't have anywhere to get rid of their.
-
Unknown B
And they read that the. The. That little napkin that they had on the. You know, the. The big white wig people, they had, like, a little handkerchief, but. And they would just carry it, bro, just to. And they would have perfume on it. They would put in their nose, so they would have to smell like the poor people.
-
Unknown A
Well, it wasn't just that, man. It was the shit in the streets because they didn't have cars, so they had horses. The horses would shit all over the roads.
-
Unknown B
And nobody had a job picking it up yet.
-
Unknown A
Oh, dude.
-
Unknown C
One job was someone would just put down, like, a handkerchief so you could walk over it.
-
Unknown A
Well, just fucking clean it up, you lazy bitch.
-
Unknown B
And throwing, like, shit water out of a. Look at this.
-
Unknown A
Imagine breathing that every day. There's no way that's good for you. You think scented candles are bad for you? Imagine. Imagine the people that lived back then. You're worried about Ultra complain.
-
Unknown B
You're worried about Ultra raised.
-
Unknown A
Whoa. Poop once flowed freely in the streets of New York. Look, that was a poop pipe that would go right down the street. Jesus Christ.
-
Unknown B
Oh, man. When I was at my grandma's house in Mexico, they still had an outhouse. They didn't have no plumbing, bro.
-
Unknown A
Isn't it interesting? Because this is a terrible way to live, that people insisted on doing it this way.
-
Unknown C
I was thinking the day that they figured it out, you'd be like, oh, my God. What the.
-
Unknown A
But imagine because you had to figure it out to get it to where it is now. Right. So people had to go through that to get to the Manhattan of today, where it's all super sophisticated, amazing hotels, amazing restaurants. But why would you stick around? Have you breathed in shit every day? Every day you go live on a farm, I'd be like, this experiment. This is terrible. This is not for us. This is for the benefit of people in the future. We're destroying soil.
-
Unknown B
Men who carted away of America's waste, bro.
-
Unknown A
You know how sick people must have been back then? No antibiotics, everybody's breathing in. You fall, you slip, you skin your knee. Your knee gets infected with staphylo, you die.
-
Unknown B
Oh, man, you got shit in your knee.
-
Unknown C
That's what it says.
-
Unknown A
The what it say?
-
Unknown C
People are gagging as this cart would walk by.
-
Unknown B
Oh, God.
-
Unknown A
On a Summer Day in 1873, a cart stood on Sixth Avenue in New York City filled to the brink with raw human waste. The cart was uncovered, its contents exposed to the air and to the passersby, who wretched and gagged as they scurried away, excrement dipped off the sides of the cart and the sidewalks and gutters were smeared with the stuff. The stench was so strong that it could be smelled from more than a block away. It was another day in pre sewer America, bro.
-
Unknown B
Meanwhile, you're reading.
-
Unknown A
Here's the thing, man. This is after the Civil War.
-
Unknown B
Yeah. This is 1873, and you're in Italy reading books, talking about the streets are made of gold soil.
-
Unknown C
They call it night soil.
-
Unknown B
Night soil?
-
Unknown A
Yeah. They used it for. I mean, they used it for compost, right? Oh, so just the name euphemistically given a human waste because it was removed from the privies under the cloak of darkness so that polite society would be spared from confronting its own feces as the men carted the crap away, leaving a trail of stench in their wake. Every year, in cities across the country, thousands of carts brimming with extra excrement rattled through the night streets. There was an antiquated solution to a modern problem. America's cities were full of crap. So the people were just throwing the shit in the streets?
-
Unknown B
Yes.
-
Unknown C
Oh, how much could those guys get paid?
-
Unknown A
It's not possible. Shitty. They got paid. Shitty.
-
Unknown B
What a shitty job.
-
Unknown A
Imagine being at a bar.
-
Unknown B
Look at them in.
-
Unknown C
Barrels.
-
Unknown A
Oh, get a horse pulled wagon filled with shit. That is so crazy. Whoa. So living back then was hell, bro. We're so lucky. And that's how they're gonna look at us, these future beings that no longer have war, that no longer have greed or anger. These future beings that are connected to the hive mind, they're gonna look back at us like Felipe.
-
Unknown C
Dump grounds are next to the White House.
-
Unknown A
We're living like idiots.
-
Unknown B
They've got breath dunk.
-
Unknown A
I bet one of the dumping grounds was a field near the White House where a marsh of Washingtonian waste putrefied under the president's nose. This suggests that this may have been a contributing factor to President Harris's untimely death in 1841, since the White House water source was a mere seven blocks downstream. Killed the president with shit water.
-
Unknown B
Oh, my God. He died of dysentery, bro.
-
Unknown A
This is why you can't trust the experts are looking out for your health. They didn't even protect the President. Somebody concocted this idea. And they never even thought about the potential for ruining all the water that people drink. They just said, this is a good place to dump all this. How nasty. People are so nasty.
-
Unknown B
Oh, man. I also think about.
-
Unknown A
That's so nasty.
-
Unknown B
And condoms back then were probably still sheep's wool, right?
-
Unknown A
Sheepskin.
-
Unknown B
Sheepskin. I saw a movie where a woman, a guy, a woman. She was washing the contraceptive.
-
Unknown A
Yeah.
-
Unknown B
Right after this white wig guy threw it at her face. Wow. So. So she's using the same one for every man.
-
Unknown A
Oh, my God.
-
Unknown C
So they didn't have even by 1880s, 2/3 of flushing toilets still just went into a backyard cesspool. Read this part here.
-
Unknown A
Overflowing privy was a sight to behold in James McCabe's 1882 account of new York street life. He described one man's yard in which the privy's contents drained down into a street sewer, forming a miniature loathsome Niagara of night soil. The cascading sewage flowed right by the window so that a young. So that a man sitting on a chair at the window would not have to own. Would not have only the odor, but also the views of this loathsome matter circulating at his feet in the pool below. Yeah, see, this is why everybody was so sick.
-
Unknown B
This is by the thought of the plague.
-
Unknown A
Well, also, like, there's no. No one's clean.
-
Unknown C
Cholera outbreak, 1849.
-
Unknown A
Yeah. I say that is the biggest breakthrough ever in the controlling of diseases. The biggest breakthrough is sanitation. I was just thinking about sanitation using.
-
Unknown C
These words, dumping grounds in this time period too. This is the same time those bones were dumped in the east river with. Who knows?
-
Unknown B
Yeah.
-
Unknown A
There's not enough vaccines in the world to protect you when you're living like that, you know, imagine the pharmaceutical drug companies would try to Sell you if you were living like that and they figured out how to counteract all the different things that you're inhaling in the air from human.
-
Unknown B
They're so nasty, man.
-
Unknown A
So nasty. Killed the President, bro.
-
Unknown B
Why? Imagine him getting up in a morning, waking up in the morning. Good morning, everybody.
-
Unknown A
I'm glad you just said that about dumping bodies, because this is a thing I need to send you. Jamie, I'm so glad you brought that up, because I read this. I don't want to fuck this up. I want to figure out what the fuck this actually means. Here, I'm going to send this to you, Jamie. It's about liquid human remains.
-
Unknown B
Liquid human remains?
-
Unknown A
Yeah. So with this article saying, oh, it's like an Instagram thing, then being fed back to the population via fertilizer on crops, that.
-
Unknown B
So he's making. I hope.
-
Unknown A
I hope it's not true.
-
Unknown B
Making menudo with people or what?
-
Unknown A
I don't know. It sounds like they were using it for fertilizer. Using people for fertilizer and using people for supplements. Somehow or another. Like how they're saying you're boiling down a human body.
-
Unknown B
Are they compensating the family?
-
Unknown A
I don't know. But also, there's no DNA. So what did you need the body for? The whole body's DNA. Like, what are you saying? There's no DNA. So what did you. You broke it down to chemicals and now it's okay. So you broke the human body, the container of a soul, down to chemicals, and you're gonna pour it on your flowers and that's okay? That seems weird.
-
Unknown B
I know. It's all made up.
-
Unknown A
It seems weird. Like, what do you. How the fuck we should find out how the fuck they do it? Is there a video we can watch on them doing it?
-
Unknown B
What kind of. And how they liquefy them with hot water.
-
Unknown A
It said hot water. And something else. They added some other stuff too, but whatever, man. What do we.
-
Unknown B
What the fuck?
-
Unknown A
Is this it? Oh. Oh, my God. The most eco. Let's listen to this, can we?
-
Unknown B
No, they put them in there alive.
-
Unknown A
No, Felipe, these are dead bodies. They're just cooking them. Cooking them up nice. And that's what they get, like little bones and pieces.
-
Unknown B
Well, I want to be cremated, but if that's an option.
-
Unknown C
You're just talking about it.
-
Unknown A
Yeah, but you don't want your body being resold as fertilizer. It's just weird to pour dead people on top of your carrots so they grow better.
-
Unknown B
Sprinkle me.
-
Unknown A
What are they Breaking it down to. What are they breaking the human body down to? That's valuable for them to do that. Like, what is the stuff they're looking for? Let's find that out. First of all, we don't even know if it's true.
-
Unknown C
Yeah, no, I don't. I wouldn't take that as truth. I wouldn't even believe that. How would they. How would this.
-
Unknown A
Can you Google and see if there's other stories that say that? Okay, I'm not pushing you.
-
Unknown C
I gotta read.
-
Unknown A
Oh, I understand. Whatever it is, it seems like you're supposed to leave people alone when they're dead. Okay. We're supposed to be different than everything else on the planet. We love each other more than we love anything else. You can use monkeys for experiments, but.
-
Unknown C
Some states allow the remaining liquid with its peptides, sugars, amino acids, and captured carbon to be reclaimed and repurposed as fertilizer.
-
Unknown A
Yo, yo, they're turning. Do they have to tell you, like, how they have to tell you if you're gonna buy a haunted house? Do they have to. You know, if there's a house where someone killed his whole family in it, they have to tell you that.
-
Unknown B
You see the oak tree? That's Joe Diaz, by the way.
-
Unknown A
What?
-
Unknown B
No, they're making them to a soil. Right? So.
-
Unknown A
Oh, right.
-
Unknown B
So you see that oak tree right there?
-
Unknown A
We use Joey Diaz.
-
Unknown B
But you do have particles. That's right.
-
Unknown A
Do you think they have to tell you, though, that you're buying dead people fertilizer? Or they just consider it chemicals at that point? How do they get away with selling you dead people? Because it seems like if you had the option. Hey, do you want, like, manure?
-
Unknown C
It's been around for a long time.
-
Unknown B
Whoa, pats. It's in 1888.
-
Unknown A
They've been boiling people and turn them into fertilizer since the 1800s.
-
Unknown B
So we have that machine, but not no sewage.
-
Unknown A
Wow.
-
Unknown C
Trying to find out where. They say that they've used it for.
-
Unknown A
Other stuff, but the scary thing is. What? Them saying that they use it for calcium deficiencies because that means you're feeding people other people's bones so they can get a source of calcium.
-
Unknown B
But that guy's vegan, so don't give it to him.
-
Unknown A
Maybe it's okay because the person consented.
-
Unknown B
Yes. True.
-
Unknown C
Cremation Social Seems like a solid place, huh?
-
Unknown A
So body plus 95% water, 5% alkaline. Basic chemicals, either potassium hydroxide or sodium hydroxide or a combo sterile effluent water, salt, sugars, Amino acids, peptides, bone fragments, calcium phosphate. So that's what they get out of it. So they boil it down in this solution and they get out all these different things. Water, salt, sugar, amino acids, peptides, and then calcium phosphate. And then I guess what do they do with the calcium? So if you're buying calcium, you find out it's from dead people. They should probably let you know. You probably should have to let people.
-
Unknown B
Know that I drink dead people.
-
Unknown A
You would sell a lot if you made it from dead people. For sure. Like if you had a skull and crossbones on the bottle, there's a lot of assholes who'd buy that.
-
Unknown B
But then people start looking at that like they'd look at Chicka. How was he raised? What kind of parrot did he have?
-
Unknown A
Oh, yeah, for sure. Yeah.
-
Unknown B
If you're really into anxiety problems is.
-
Unknown A
Are you really into eating someone? What if they were a up person and you take a little bit of their soul inside of you and you go insane?
-
Unknown B
Bro, we crazy, man.
-
Unknown A
Well, that's got to be what's happening with the cannibals when they get that disease and they all get. They get shaky. The prion disease that they get from eating each other.
-
Unknown B
Did Jeffrey Dahmer have that?
-
Unknown A
I don't think so. I think you have to eat spinal tissue. You have to eat brain and spinal tissue. And it's. They're called prions. And the thing about prions is you can't even boil them. Like you. If you cook them at like a thousand degrees, I think for like hours, it doesn't kill them.
-
Unknown B
If you've been. If you ever get to invite to a restaurant, they tell you you're. Would you serve? You're a human being. Would you eat it?
-
Unknown A
No, why would I eat a person?
-
Unknown B
Or will they tell you after. Man, you just ate a.
-
Unknown A
Well, I'd be really mad.
-
Unknown B
Compose acriline body that we made into chicken.
-
Unknown A
Yeah, I wouldn't like that. Would you like that, Felipe?
-
Unknown B
Hell no.
-
Unknown A
Yeah, it would be weird.
-
Unknown B
Needs more salt, please.
-
Unknown A
Remember that movie Soylent Green? Do you remember that movie?
-
Unknown B
No.
-
Unknown A
It was an old, old timey science fiction movie, but people were being fed Soylent Green. And then this guy figures out that Soylent Green is made out of people and they're. They're serving people like this fucking protein biscuit that's made out of humans. Yeah, but there's people.
-
Unknown B
Is that the one, the old movie, right?
-
Unknown A
There's people that would.
-
Unknown B
Do they end with a woman boiling a foot?
-
Unknown A
Oh, I don't remember that. Maybe I don't remember. It was a long time ago. I just remember the premise of the movie. I probably haven't seen that movie 20 plus years.
-
Unknown B
I saw one where a guy was called a Microwave massacre.
-
Unknown A
Microwave mask.
-
Unknown B
This guy murdered his wife in a microwave. No. He cuts out her pieces and microwaves the body and makes lunches and he takes him to work every day.
-
Unknown A
Wait, this is a real guy?
-
Unknown B
Real movie.
-
Unknown A
Wait a minute. A real movie or a real person?
-
Unknown B
It's a real movie called Microwave Massacre, but probably based on a real guy. And he would take food that he made it from people he murdered and they would eat it at work. And then when they finally caught him, everybody at work was throwing up.
-
Unknown A
I think there was a woman who got caught eating her husband and serving him to the neighbors.
-
Unknown B
Wow.
-
Unknown A
How much you have to hate that dude to serve him to you. How much do you hate your neighbors? Say, I'm going to watch these motherfuckers eat my husband. I'm going to cook it up nice. Cook up that ass cheek.
-
Unknown B
Turn him. You really like my husband.
-
Unknown A
You're going to love this dish. This is his favorite. Jesus Christ.
-
Unknown B
I'm in a consomme for him too.
-
Unknown A
A nice bone broth. Good for the soul. Yeah. So that's where that shit comes from. Prions. It's. They're scary. That's mad cow disease. That's what cannibals get. It's a very sketchy disease. There's another one right now that deers have. It's called chronic wasting disease. Same kind of deal. It's a prion disease and deers are getting it. And they froth at the mouth and drool and their body shrivels up. Very creepy, man.
-
Unknown B
You can't eat those.
-
Unknown A
No, you can, because there's no crossover to people. But I wouldn't suggest it. I wouldn't recommend it. I mean, I wouldn't. The thing is, you can test and you could find out if your deer is okay. Like you can shoot them and then test them and then, you know, you're good to go and you can eat the deer. But if it's test positive, it hasn't jumped from animal to people. It's only an animal. But the what it does to animals is so grave. Why would you take that chance? This is how I feel. Why would you take a chance of consuming an animal that literally has the plague inside of it? Because for deer, that's the plague. These deer, I mean, they're not even see the thing like with people, a disease like that would spread like wildfire, right? With deer, they're out in these big giant open areas and yet still it's spreading from their saliva onto leaves and then other deer pick it up.
-
Unknown B
Hmm.
-
Unknown A
Yeah, it's. It's super fucking contagious and it kills the shit out of them. And if that jumps to people, that's a real problem. That's a real fucking problem. Because I don't know if they have medication that combats it in deer. I don't know what research they've done and trying to figure it out, but I know it's, it's such a problem that there's a lot of places where they're killing extra deer just to try to keep the populations lower so they don't interact with each other as much and so don't catch it from giving it back and forth to each other.
-
Unknown B
And people have this right now.
-
Unknown A
No humans have it yet, but I think chronic wasting disease has been. It used to be one type of deer. I'm not sure what deer it started out with. It might have been mule deer, but it's in a lot of white tailed deer in America. And apparently it's made its way into other ungulates. Like I think it's in elk and I think they might have even found it in moose. It's scary shit, man, because it's basically a zombie virus. It turns you into a skeleton and you waste away. Yeah, it's horrific. And it's probably some of it came from farms because they think that that's one of the ways that it's spread. Like there's a lot of deer farms that do a great job. They're very ethical. So if you wanted a property and you wanted your own private hunting property and you wanted to put a high fence up, take care of the ground, put food plots in there for the animals.
-
Unknown A
This is how you, you know, you got a thousand acres, want to fence it all in. Like you could do that in Texas and you can buy deer. So you say, okay, I want to buy, you know, like 20 white tailed deer and let them loosen my property. You know, you got this thousand acre spot or wherever you're at. If you get a deer that is from a farm that's unethical, they're all going to be stacked next to each other just like pigs. When you watch fucking factory farming for pigs, they're going to be corralled and shitty. Most of them don't do this. But you're always going to have people that Are unethical. And when people do things where diseases start getting spread and they kind of COVID it up or lie about it because they don't want to lose money, and then they're sending deer around.
-
Unknown A
So, like, there's a lot of regulations now on how you can move deer across state lines because of these diseases.
-
Unknown B
If you have bad deer meat, can you cover it up with a bunch of good deer meat where that bad meat disappears?
-
Unknown A
What do you mean?
-
Unknown B
She said, like, because I remember myself cooking, and I had, like, I spilled like a shitload of garlic on my oatmeal, and I was making an oatmeal for 15 motherfuckers in rehab. So I just started putting more oatmeal, more oatmeal, and more milk to hide the garlic smell. But in the end, everybody was farting anyway, so they still got it. But do people do. That's what you're saying, that people do that with deer meat? That when they cover it up, you could do that.
-
Unknown A
Yeah. You could make some people who are.
-
Unknown B
Not unethical, they hide it.
-
Unknown A
No, no, no. See, what we're talking about, chronic wasting disease is it's. That's different.
-
Unknown B
Right.
-
Unknown A
It probably wouldn't even affect the taste of the animal. They'd probably be very lean because there's not much left of them. Or they could have just gotten it, and they could look. Be healthy looking, and they still have this disease. They still test positive for it. My fear would be about what that disease is going to do if it jumps to human beings. And if you're consuming it, Are we sure that it just goes out of your system, or is it just inert? It doesn't work in your system? Could it work eventually? Is it something that has an incubation period that maybe, maybe not now. Maybe it will have one in five years from now or ten years from now. Maybe the version of chronic wasting disease, if it evolves and changes.
-
Unknown B
Yeah.
-
Unknown A
Is going to be making the jump to humans. That's a scary disease to make the jump to humans. You know, there's a bunch of those out there. Yeah, man. And then there's the ones that we make.
-
Unknown B
Gonorrhea.
-
Unknown A
No, like Covid. They made that in a lab. They made it in a lab. It's spread across the whole world. Do you think they made aids in a lab?
-
Unknown B
Wow. You say like aids, like aids. Somebody. I read that somewhere. Somebody said, oh, they make all that in labs. Well within, like, part of, like, chemical warfare, right?
-
Unknown A
That is a part of chemical warfare.
-
Unknown B
Like putting Disease blankets on natives, you know, and.
-
Unknown A
Well, they've done a bunch of fucking studies. Like, that's the big.
-
Unknown B
No, I'm sorry. The natives had influenza blankets. That's what they had.
-
Unknown A
Oh, yeah, no, no, that was smallpox.
-
Unknown B
Smallpox.
-
Unknown A
But I don't know if that's even true because I don't think they really knew what, like, how diseases were spread back then. I don't think they knew that you could just, like, put scabs on a blanket and give people smallpox. And if you had smallpox, are you trying to dish out smallpox? Are you trying to catch it? So you're handling it, then putting it in blankets. It seems like an exaggerated cruelty of what happened. And what happened was Europeans came over here, Native Americans had, whatever you want to call them, the indigenous people. They did not have any immunity to smallpox, and it wiped out 90% of them diseases from North Americans, or from Europeans, rather, coming to North America. They wiped out everybody with disease. It's somewhere in the neighborhood of 90% of the people that were here are gone because of disease. So, you know, when people want to think that there's.
-
Unknown A
There's no way to prepare, like, a. A group of human beings that has no immunity in, you know, 1492. There's no way to. There's no way to prepare. There's no way to prepare anybody. You're. You're coming in with these stinky European streets filled with shit water, right? Everybody's got some funky parasite, funky disease. They probably stink. They're probably infested with.
-
Unknown B
You probably. Smell that away.
-
Unknown A
They probably have viruses, fighting viruses inside their body. Coughing, phlegm and blood. And they're drinking whiskey, and they come.
-
Unknown B
Over to probably having sex with each other.
-
Unknown A
Yeah. And it's probably. None of it's consensual. It's probably animals biting each other and holding each other down, fucking each other. And then they come to North America and they start slaughtering people. And there's this one. We've talked about this before. He was like a bishop or some religious man who chronicled one of Christopher. Christopher Columbus's early interactions.
-
Unknown B
Yes.
-
Unknown A
With these people. And it's horrific shit, man. Cutting people's arms off if they don't bring back their weight. And gold. And dashing babies on rocks in front of their parents. Horrific shit, man. And those are the kind of people that brought those diseases like you want to talk about. That's like a real demon horde.
-
Unknown B
Crazy, huh?
-
Unknown A
Crazy. A real demon horde of people come over on a boat, stinking, covered in their own Shit breathing diseases on everybody. Everybody's dying. Like, well, he's so unhealthy.
-
Unknown B
I know man. Like I think about that, that pirate, I don't know, one of the pirates.
-
Unknown A
Blackbeard.
-
Unknown B
Blackbeard, man, he was full of gonorrhea.
-
Unknown A
Oh, bet.
-
Unknown B
And he would drop. He would drop mercury on his penis to. To really for. To cure his diseases on his penis because that's. That's all they had.
-
Unknown A
What a good move. Who invented that? What asshole was like Char Mercury.
-
Unknown B
He probably was on a pirate ship somewhere, met a voodoo doctor and said, hey man, Mercury put in your dick.
-
Unknown A
Did mercury kill his dick? Yeah, it says when held prison. When he held prisoners for ransom, such as the governor's son. During the week long Charlestown blockade in 1718, he asked for expensive medical supplies. This included liquid mercury, which when injected through a urethral syringe. Yes, was a common ineffective treatment for syphilis. Injected through your pee hole with a fucking syringe. Yo. BlackBerry. Blackbeard had up to 14 wives in different ports. Wow. Damn. Well, somebody's do a movie about that guy.
-
Unknown B
Imagine man, he had the money to put mercury on his dick. The rest of the crew probably didn't. So there are. They're fucking everything, man. Fucking shit up.
-
Unknown A
There's this temple in China that they are afraid to go into. They discovered it and this emperor, when he died was such a great emperor that he had this whole field of terracotta statues that were built that look like warriors that are guarding him. It's crazy discovery that they had.
-
Unknown B
They're giant, right?
-
Unknown A
But the ground all around where this temple is, is test for high levels of mercury. And the ancient story is that anybody who ever dared open up this temple, open up this tomb rather where this emperor is buried, will drown in mercury.
-
Unknown B
I thought you gotta say they got gonorrhea.
-
Unknown A
No, imagine drowning. Drowning in. Imagine like 2000 years ago, a dude sets up a booby trap for greedy people and sets it up where he fills the entire tomb up with mercury. First of all, is that even possible? How much mercury would you have to handle? And how many people would have to die from that mercury? Imagine where. First of all, where do they even get it? Yeah, where do they get mercury in 2000 plus years ago? Do you know that story about that emperor in his temple? No, Teotihuacan is Aztec.
-
Unknown C
I know, but it says. Well this is like.
-
Unknown A
Yeah, that's probably a common booby track, I bet. But this one where there's temple in.
-
Unknown C
China, top of Google it says temple drowned in mercury. Refers to the temple of Teotihuacan Temple.
-
Unknown A
Can you say temple booby trapped with mercury in China. I think it's like the first emperor of China.
-
Unknown C
It says it too. I mean, it says it could have.
-
Unknown B
Been a thing that they did unearthed.
-
Unknown C
It says it was in China.
-
Unknown A
Yeah, this is the one. So there's one that they have not entered into and I think this is the one with the terracotta statues in front of it. There's one of the. I think there's a common thing. When great people died, they probably made a terracotta army for them. When they find these things, it's like you. Here it is. It's us talking about it. Crazy story of first emperor of China's tomb. That's me and Schultz talking about it. Right click on that so I'll remember. It's not our video. It's my fucking video, bitch.
-
Unknown C
Somebody else's video. Oh, someone else uploaded.
-
Unknown A
Well, that's ridiculous. But it's ours, right?
-
Unknown B
Yeah. It's funny when.
-
Unknown A
So what is the zoom? They would have a copyright on my voice.
-
Unknown C
I don't want to get into it, but. Yeah, we probably have the. The revenue's probably coming to our thing because of people claiming it. But it's up. I'm just saying. That's why I'm bringing that up was.
-
Unknown B
A lot of the clips that I watched are from other people sharing them.
-
Unknown C
I was just saying it's not ours. So I don't know if.
-
Unknown A
Okay, okay, okay. Don't put it up then.
-
Unknown B
Yeah, got it.
-
Unknown A
But anyway, the point is this. There's a tomb in China that's supposedly booby trapped with tons of liquid mercury. I'm sure Jamie will find it. But it's this area around it apparently tests high for mercury. So they think that it might be a true story and they don't want to go in there. They don't want to fucking open up the door and die. Which is wild. That this dude set this up. If he did 2000 plus years ago. I don't even remember how many thousands of years ago it was, but it was insanely impressive.
-
Unknown B
Wow. Amazing. To think of something like that and still works.
-
Unknown A
Yeah, like where the fuck. Where do you. While Jamie's looking this up, where the fuck do you think they get mercury? And how much can they get? How much can they have back then?
-
Unknown B
I've only seen a thermometer.
-
Unknown A
I know. Like where are they getting it?
-
Unknown C
Throughout antiquities. Remember we've talked about cinnabar before.
-
Unknown A
Cinnabar.
-
Unknown C
It's where they got red stuff. Also cinnabar and antiquity was the source of all mercury.
-
Unknown A
So how did they do it?
-
Unknown B
Little pool of it.
-
Unknown A
How did they do it? Does it say how they did it?
-
Unknown C
I mean, it says to extract you need to roasted in air, converting the sulfur to sulfur dioxide. While the mercury is released as vapor, it can be then condensed. Since Mercury boils at 357 Celsius, this process needs temperatures well within. They need some kilns. They had those.
-
Unknown A
Wow. So they just cooked up mercury.
-
Unknown C
It was hard to do, but they did it.
-
Unknown A
Wow. Well, if they can make a temple like this guy had, they can cook up mercury and fill that temple. That is crazy to think of. I wish maybe there's going to be a way with new technology where they can like pierce into the ground where they can see into things without having to like actually go in there physically. Because I know they're doing like the lidar stuff. I know they can kind of detect where they used to be.
-
Unknown C
Agriculture places someone digging into. Is this claim real? And this says that even if.
-
Unknown B
So.
-
Unknown A
Even though mercury, either as a cinnabar or as the elemental metal, has been found in tombs dating as far back as the second millennium bc, it's not clear why it was put there. Might its toxicity have acted as a deterrent to grave looters? Probably not. The dangers of mercury fumes were not recognized until Han times. If so, it seems there's a lot of mercury in the burial chamber. It's likely to be either a preservative or an anti theft device. So the big theory is that it's an anti theft device and that's why people are terrified of going in there. Here, hold it right here. Based on estimates of mercury production from the Song era and allowing for the imperfections of the earlier refinement process, he thinks the chamber might have contained at most 100 tons of the liquid metal. Holy shit. A hundred tons.
-
Unknown B
How did black beard fight this shit?
-
Unknown A
Well, that wasn't Blackbeard, that was China.
-
Unknown B
How do you find mercury back then? Shiver me timbers.
-
Unknown A
They probably had a bi. Oh, they have like a look at that. That was the device they stuck in their dick.
-
Unknown B
Oh my. That's a saying, right? Shiver me timbers that were surprised or shocked.
-
Unknown A
I think they're saying that just for funsies.
-
Unknown C
Oh yeah, they found this in Iraq.
-
Unknown A
Oh my God. This guy had a mercury mercering for my pee pee. And look, it's all rough looking and it's not even polished good.
-
Unknown B
Maggie probably Drawing in the map. Don't go over there, man. If you're gonna go to this island, take lots of mercury.
-
Unknown A
Meanwhile, they all died from that, right? Syphilis.
-
Unknown C
Look at this. A pump cluster. Which would have been to use pump fluid into the rectum, allowing the body to quickly absorb it. They were taken like animals. They're boofing.
-
Unknown A
They're boofing. So they were doing that for drugs. Pump liquid into the. Rather. Yeah, liquid into the rectum. Well, aren't people doing that? Like moonshine? Don't they pour moonshine in their. This is what I heard.
-
Unknown B
They pour coffee Now, I heard people.
-
Unknown A
Take tampons filled with vodka and stuff them in their.
-
Unknown C
I mean, they've been doing it since the days of the pirates, so it's not new, bro.
-
Unknown A
What the is wrong with people?
-
Unknown C
Severe dehydration by pumping fluid in that.
-
Unknown B
People like putting stuff on their butt.
-
Unknown C
And also a bloodletting instrument called a porringer.
-
Unknown A
I had a buddy of mine, and he did his medical residency in Miami in the 1980s during the cocaine times. And he said, dude, that's where he did his residency. So he was in the emergency room. So it's like every day, someone's coming in with something stuffed up their ass. They're coked out of their mind. They got GI Joe stuffed up their ass. He found people with light bulbs. Those, like, twisty, pine cone looking light bulbs stuck up their ass.
-
Unknown B
Damn, bro.
-
Unknown A
All kinds of things stuck up their ass.
-
Unknown B
I did a show at Lompoc State Penitentiary, and one of the guards told me that some guy made a vibrator out of seven handballs. Another one, the Void, and he taped them all up. And then what happened? How do you guys know? Well, he didn't tie them up too good. And they were all stuck in there. We had to take them all out.
-
Unknown A
Oh, no, he didn't tie him up good.
-
Unknown B
Yeah, because he didn't put enough wrapping, I guess.
-
Unknown A
Go in his butt and get all those balls.
-
Unknown B
Yeah.
-
Unknown A
How many were in there?
-
Unknown B
Like, five. Whatever. Whatever. How many balls make this? And you thought he was hiding a knife.
-
Unknown A
That's a hard way to go, too, because sometimes people die that way. You get, you know, toxic shock. Something goes wrong, you tear your rectum, you bleed out internally, toughen things up your ass. Like the Mr. Hand story. You know the Mr. Hand story, right?
-
Unknown B
No.
-
Unknown A
There's a whole movie based on it called Zoo. Zoo is a thing called Zoophilia, where people are sexually attracted to farm animals. And so these people met up online and they found out that you're still allowed to fuck animals in Washington state. So they all went to Washington state. Washington state, right. Yeah.
-
Unknown B
All right.
-
Unknown A
And this dude got fucked to death by a horse. They bring him to the emergency room, like, what's going on? And, you know, everyone's acting a little shifty. And then they have to tell the whole story. And they find out these people have like hundreds of hours of people getting fucked by donkeys and horses and shit. And they all did this out on this. This weird ranch.
-
Unknown B
Wow.
-
Unknown A
Yeah.
-
Unknown B
You know, one of the.
-
Unknown A
That's how the dude died.
-
Unknown B
One of the first books, you know, they used to be a lot of sex books when we were kids, and they were all rotten. They were all nasty books about sex.
-
Unknown A
Yeah.
-
Unknown B
The first one I ever read was about people having sex with animals.
-
Unknown A
Oh, yeah.
-
Unknown B
But they were like, remember those Penthouse stories or Playboy stories? But these were all with animals. And I remember the woman telling this whole story about having sex with a horse.
-
Unknown A
Jesus Christ.
-
Unknown B
And like, just riding that fool.
-
Unknown A
You never see the Mr. Hands video? There's a video, one video that got leaked online way back in the day. Brian Redband sent it to me. And it's this dude getting railed by the horse. And it's not even the one where he dies. Apparently he dies in another video. But in this video, you see the size of the horse's dick and you see his body and you see his ass, and you're like, there's no way.
-
Unknown B
How many people helped him? Because one guy.
-
Unknown A
One guy grabbed it and just pointed it in the right direction. And the horse was one gigantic thrust of death. And the guy makes this horrible sound. And then his friend goes too much. And then his friend is like, oh, he came. He came. The horse came. And you're like, this is the sickest fucking thing I've ever seen in my life. And that's how that guy died. That guy in that video that's getting fucked by that horse was the guy who eventually dies from it.
-
Unknown B
Did they put the horse to sleep afterwards?
-
Unknown A
I don't think so. It's not the horse's fault. The horse do. The horse is gonna. You know, I wouldn't bend over in front of him. Right. He's kind of conditioned now. It's not his fault.
-
Unknown C
Kind of says they only found out about all this because he died.
-
Unknown A
Yes. Like, yeah, that's what I said. Oh, yeah.
-
Unknown C
But it's like. It's just.
-
Unknown B
Yeah, well, that is. First time. Or the trial ponies first.
-
Unknown A
No, he had Been by a bunch of horses or a bunch of times by the same horse. But there was apparently many hours this guy getting by horses like that, 100.
-
Unknown C
VHS tapes and DVDs.
-
Unknown B
But it's real, right? Not like an urban legend like people say. I went to TJ and saw a donkey show.
-
Unknown A
You want to see it?
-
Unknown B
You gonna show it?
-
Unknown C
Yeah, this is still my old computer, I guess.
-
Unknown A
Oh, do you have it? You can still get it, right?
-
Unknown C
I don't know where to look. I'll look.
-
Unknown A
I bet you could get it. I bet if you put it on up on X. X is one of the few places where actually it's actually illegal. So maybe you can have it on X because bestiality. Well, it wasn't illegal when they were doing it, though. Yeah, there's a point. Kind of.
-
Unknown B
No, that's what's called. That's called bestiality. When you have sex with a. With an animal.
-
Unknown A
Okay, so it's called you're gross.
-
Unknown B
And what's the one when you have sex with dead bodies? That is necrophilia, right?
-
Unknown C
Don't look on X for that.
-
Unknown A
Yeah, you can't find an X.
-
Unknown C
It's a different search result that pops up.
-
Unknown A
Oh, yeah. They probably game the search results now, right? Yeah, yeah.
-
Unknown C
There's a lot of 21 and older material.
-
Unknown B
People have sex with animals, right? Like since. Do you want to talk about Gangs of New York? How ugly it was, right?
-
Unknown A
Everything that was in front of them. Okay, here it is. Headphones, please.
-
Unknown C
We'll make sure it.
-
Unknown A
Oh, yeah. There it is.
-
Unknown C
I mean, you verify that? That's it.
-
Unknown A
Oh, that's 100 it. Okay, absolutely. Go full screen and don't show it on screen at all.
-
Unknown C
Mute the sound when we play this.
-
Unknown A
Nope, nope. Let's hear it.
-
Unknown B
Okay. Dana Cruz.
-
Unknown A
It's on a porn site, I guess. Here we go.
-
Unknown B
Here's the sound that's reversed him.
-
Unknown A
So that's the guy's butt. The horse gets on top of him, and then the guy grabs it. Look at this. Watch this. Look at the distance. Look at the amount of tissue we're talking about here. Watch this.
-
Unknown B
Like, long, down, silver.
-
Unknown A
This is on a loop. This is repeating.
-
Unknown B
This is repeating.
-
Unknown A
Yeah, this is. It's already. The whole thing really only lasts a couple of seconds.
-
Unknown B
Wow.
-
Unknown A
That guy died.
-
Unknown B
The guy has no.
-
Unknown A
The movie's fascinating because the movie is like a documentary sort of recreation of those people. And it's not like that. You don't see things, but you just see how bananas the whole.
-
Unknown B
That horse Is known for that. Or do you have to grab random horse? Because he seemed to know what he was doing, bro.
-
Unknown A
Well, he probably been that guy for a long time. They've probably been doing. That's what I'm saying. Like it killed him one day. But I think he had never showed that right?
-
Unknown B
Because.
-
Unknown A
No, no.
-
Unknown B
Peter. Come after us. No.
-
Unknown C
Who knows what I was really showing.
-
Unknown A
Yeah, we were just making noises.
-
Unknown C
Cartoons.
-
Unknown B
That is Mr. What the. My name is Mr. Red.
-
Unknown A
There's people out there that are out of their minds. They're out of their mind. You're getting to death by a horse in a grainy video. You know, like, what. What is life for you?
-
Unknown B
That must be crazy.
-
Unknown A
That's your thing. You're getting off work at 5. And I think the guy who died was an intelligent guy. Was he? Wasn't he an engineer?
-
Unknown C
Worked at Boeing for over eight years.
-
Unknown A
Yeah, bro, he was a Boeing engineer who liked to get to death by a horse. That horse's dick is as long as an arm. Look at how long that dick is.
-
Unknown B
Oh, like long. Dongsu.
-
Unknown A
The size of that.
-
Unknown B
Like 17 and a half inches.
-
Unknown A
It was gigantic. It's probably bigger than that. When it goes into his body, where's the room? Where's the space? How.
-
Unknown B
How do you warm up to it?
-
Unknown A
I guess you start with fingers.
-
Unknown B
Then you move up to ketchup bottles.
-
Unknown C
The ability to experience certain sensations after a motorcycle accident.
-
Unknown A
Accident. Oh, so that was the only way he could feel.
-
Unknown C
Things started going ham.
-
Unknown A
Oh, God, that's terrifying. That's terrifying.
-
Unknown C
I don't know why I started filming it, though.
-
Unknown A
Well, you know what? That also kind of makes sense, right? Because we've talked about this many times about brain injuries, about people with brain injuries. They get very impulsive and they do reckless things. That totally makes sense. If this guy had a motorcycle accident, that up the way he feels thing, he probably got wrecked.
-
Unknown B
That's crazy.
-
Unknown A
He got wrecked. He probably got a brain injury and it probably turned him into a wild man.
-
Unknown B
I twisted my ankle, man. Now I want a moose to fuck me in the ass.
-
Unknown A
You want to get to death by a wild animal?
-
Unknown B
You want to be the first guy.
-
Unknown A
To get butt fucked by a bear? Yeah. But you, you break your brain in that way. Like for some people, they're just different now. Yeah, now they're different. I've seen it happen to a bunch of dudes when they've been knocked out, Been knocked out really bad.
-
Unknown B
But that kids are getting like get knocked out the fuck out and you wake up it goes, is there a horse nearby? Because I'm really horny right now.
-
Unknown A
Well, who knows what's going on with the chemistry of your brain. You just want experience, you want excitement, you want to see if you could suck a horse's car.
-
Unknown B
But that goes back to your old bit. Old joke, man. Old joke. Just say, hey, you take a break today?
-
Unknown A
Yeah, take a day off.
-
Unknown B
You know, like I said, you had that joke about up in the Playboy Mansion. And. And you said that what's his name? Well, whatever. He would have. Every once in a while a gay will pop in. And then he goes. And then the punchline was. Nah, man, you take a break.
-
Unknown A
Don't start fucking guys. Yeah, take a break.
-
Unknown B
You take a break.
-
Unknown A
Yeah, relax. You're getting a little crazy.
-
Unknown B
Yeah. You. 10 shakes a day, you know that For a guy, you take a break.
-
Unknown A
I think for some people with brain injuries though, they, they get addicted to skydiving, they get addicted to gambling. They get addicted to like really reckless behavior.
-
Unknown B
Gary Busey was in a head injury, right.
-
Unknown A
A bad one.
-
Unknown B
Wonder what he's up to.
-
Unknown A
He looks like he's been in an accident. He. He fell on a motorcycle and hit his head on the curb. With no helmet on. Yeah, it was a bad one. So California didn't used to have a helmet law back then.
-
Unknown B
It's because of him, though.
-
Unknown A
Well, I don't know if it's because of him.
-
Unknown C
Yeah, I did read that he started a big push.
-
Unknown A
Yeah.
-
Unknown C
To help that.
-
Unknown A
So he helped it. But I know that people wanted this, you know, I'm torn on that. It's like, yeah, you should have helmet laws because there's 18 year old boys out there that can have motorcycles. And that's crazy. That's crazy to give. I am so glad that when I was 18, I never got a motorcycle once.
-
Unknown B
You fought over motorcycle, like. But 70 miles an hour, the helmet is like nothing, right. You're not gonna.
-
Unknown A
Nothing depends on how you fall.
-
Unknown B
How you fall. Right?
-
Unknown A
Yeah, you might slide. If you slide, you probably just get your skin ripped from your body.
-
Unknown B
Did you survive it? Yeah. Well, just woke up to a fetish.
-
Unknown A
Yeah, but that's the thing, man. If you get really banged, you could have some screwy brain waves after that, you know, and you could think everyone's out to get you. People get real weird. They get real weird and they feel like extra vulnerable because they, you know, their brain's not working the same anymore, so they don't know who they are anymore. They don't feel like they Used to feel. Yeah, they started to feel crazy, you know, and they start thinking no one wants to help them. You start getting really angry and real negative. And then you get fucked by a horse. It's just.
-
Unknown B
Nah.
-
Unknown A
Out of all the things that you could be doing, that that's. That's how you chose to go out. All these things that you could be doing, you know, you could be seeing the world.
-
Unknown B
He said, nah, man, I want to see Biscuit.
-
Unknown A
You could be a food blogger.
-
Unknown B
Nah. Ponies.
-
Unknown A
You could be a fashion influencer. Nope. No.
-
Unknown B
I want to be Willie Shoemaker.
-
Unknown A
I want to get taken out by a horse. Black stallion in some dirty barn somewhere. That's where you breathe your last breath. In a dirty barn with horse jizz in your asshole.
-
Unknown B
What does friend do?
-
Unknown A
What? I realized, they freaked out. They brought him to the hospital. They tried to drop him off. Then the. The cops start questioning him. I believe I'm paraphrasing for sure, but I think that's how they got busted. They brought off the guy and he's got a giant hole in his asshole. He's pale like a sheet.
-
Unknown B
Face.
-
Unknown A
What? Why is he. Why is the inside of his body missing? Why does he have a fucking telephone pole?
-
Unknown B
Why could we see his shoes through his mouth?
-
Unknown A
What is going on with this dude? What did you do? What'd you do? That story about Jimi Hendrix still freaks me out. I think I've been thinking about the entire time we've been talking. I go back to the idea of them just pouring pills down the greatest guitarist of all times mouth and then just pouring jugs of wine down, holding him down. And that's how he dies. That's scary.
-
Unknown B
His manager.
-
Unknown A
Mother fucking.
-
Unknown C
His US manager said this story is not true. Just for.
-
Unknown A
Of course. I would say that too. Yeah, I would say that too. I mean, I don't know if it's true. Who knows? But the. The idea. And he did. But he definitely did die. He definitely did die by asphyxiation, some people say.
-
Unknown B
Also like that the CIA did it. Jimi Hendrix.
-
Unknown A
I don't know. I haven't heard that one. But if anything happens, people always think the CIA was involved somehow. Anything, no matter what it is, right? Yeah, pretty much.
-
Unknown B
They always say that.
-
Unknown A
Yeah. I don't trust nothing.
-
Unknown B
Secret agent man.
-
Unknown A
Yeah, it's either them or it's China or it's Russia. Who's really sending me this text telling me that I'm qualified for the $4,000 in savings?
-
Unknown B
Who's.
-
Unknown A
You know those texts you get? Like, who's sending those who sticks? You know those texts that you get? Like random texts. Hey, congratulations. You receive approval for your loan.
-
Unknown B
Oh, I don't get those.
-
Unknown A
You don't get those? I get them from. For a dude named Ray. So Ray had my fucking phone number before. Fucking Ray. Ray must have signed up to every goddamn list. Ray must have put in that number every chance he could. I keep getting these fucking text messages for Ray and it's all like loans and you qualify for this and you're. This is available. We're looking for someone to hire Zoe's some weird scams.
-
Unknown B
You qualify for aluminum sidings.
-
Unknown A
I don't understand how they can't stop that from happening. It seems weird that you get so many of them. You get so many of these scam things or they get a hold of your your phone number and just spam you lies.
-
Unknown B
I think they think you get to a certain age 50 anything. You're gullible to these tricks now?
-
Unknown A
Well, I think young people are gullible.
-
Unknown B
Yeah, they send it to 22 year olds. Hey man, you want to fix your loan? Your home?
-
Unknown A
How do you have a home if you're dumb? If you're dumb and you're 22 and you get something that you qualify for 4,000. Oh shit. They think this is me. Yes. Yeah, I'll take that money. And then, you know, whatever the fuck they do, I don't know what they do.
-
Unknown B
There was a guy in LA that was calling women at their jobs and telling them they had won something and he convinced them to cut their heels off their shoes.
-
Unknown A
And he looked film it.
-
Unknown B
No, he was just calling them more randomly. Hey, you just won. Blah, blah, blah, blah. All you gotta do is cut your heels off your shoes right now. And women were doing it. And he called a bunch of chicks and they all just fucked up their shoes for nothing.
-
Unknown A
Oh, what an asshole. It's funny, but that person was mean.
-
Unknown B
I wasn't, but it was somebody rude.
-
Unknown A
Thing to do to a lady. Especially if it's your favorite shoes. You only have one pair.
-
Unknown B
Not my red bottoms, bro.
-
Unknown A
Shoes are hard to get. Those bitches are expensive, right?
-
Unknown B
Yeah.
-
Unknown A
Why are we so lucky we don't have to wear shoes that hurt. Girls wear shoes that hurt. They can only wear them for so long. Like I can't imagine. I don't even like wearing things other than sneakers. Yeah, or like a comfortable boot. Like, you know, I got a pair, a couple pairs of these origin boots. They're real comfortable, easy to walk around in. Like nice Smooth leather.
-
Unknown B
I think I ever have boots.
-
Unknown A
Boots are great, but the point is cowboy boots.
-
Unknown B
I've had Doc Martin, but not cowboy boots.
-
Unknown A
Point is they don't hurt to wear, but ladies are always wearing shoes that hurt.
-
Unknown B
What?
-
Unknown A
Crazy choice.
-
Unknown B
Five inch heels, stilettos.
-
Unknown A
That's probably why they have better pain tolerance too. They have to give birth and they wear shoes that hurt all the time, so they have to deal with pain. We're so lucky we don't have any of that stupid shit. Imagine if we had to wear makeup every day. Imagine what it'd be like. Like. Felipe, what have you done to your eyes?
-
Unknown B
I don't know, man. I put mercury on them.
-
Unknown A
Isn't that interesting? Like women all. I mean most a lot. Let's say a lot of women wear makeup every day or wake up. Makeup regularly. On a regular basis, they wear makeup. It's not a very rare occasion thing. Most. I don't know what the number is. Want to find out? Let's google it because that's probably a lot of that stuff's probably not healthy for you either, right? What's in those colors? What kind of dyes are they using?
-
Unknown B
The red dye. Huh.
-
Unknown A
Like what is all that stuff made out of? Are we sure? I mean, maybe some of it's really good for you, maybe some of it's terrible for you. Maybe it's just like the scented candle, the lipstick.
-
Unknown B
Well, I know the lipsticks. It for the native lipsticks is made out of smashed little bugs.
-
Unknown A
Yeah, that. That's one of the red dye things.
-
Unknown B
You put them right here.
-
Unknown A
Can't be bad for you, right?
-
Unknown B
Couldn't be better than a horse up your ass.
-
Unknown C
So the percentage 33 reported.
-
Unknown A
Okay, 43% of US women reported wearing makeup daily or weekly. But it doesn't break out the daily portion explicitly. Rewinding to 2019, the same source noted a higher share of women wearing makeup daily. Gen Z 18 to 24 at 30% and millennials 25 to 34, 35% suggesting a decline over time. Separate 2023 YouGov poll of a thousand US women found that 38% wear and wake make up at least a few times a week or daily. With older women 65 plus being the most likely to wear it daily compared to younger groups. They probably all wore it daily back in the day, right? You gotta keep up your looks, Gladys. Go that back. Back up again, please. Another study from 2017 by Statista indicated 41% of US women aged 30 to 59 wear makeup daily.
-
Unknown B
Yeah, there was A woman back in the. I don't know if the 1800 or 1900, she was the first woman to make a woman's magazine on clothing and home gardening. How to cook. First lady to put recipes in a magazine.
-
Unknown A
Oh, yeah.
-
Unknown B
Kind of like for a homemaker.
-
Unknown A
Right?
-
Unknown B
And then. Yeah, there was no. There wasn't a magazine back then. I don't know what the name of the magazine, but.
-
Unknown A
Jamie Google, is makeup bad for you? What do you think? Google, is makeup toxic?
-
Unknown B
When I was a kid, my seventh grade teacher thought it was bad. Put on. Don't put on that makeover.
-
Unknown C
Young girl, toxic makeup for sure.
-
Unknown A
Are they. What are. What are the ingredients in makeup that are toxic?
-
Unknown C
Wizard of Oz guy got.
-
Unknown A
Oh, that's right.
-
Unknown B
The lady with a green makeup. Yes, bro.
-
Unknown A
No, the lady with the green makeup. The wizard of Oz or the. The Tin man, the witch. Yeah, they got real sick, man. Yes, some makeup can be toxic.
-
Unknown B
Wow.
-
Unknown A
Lead, mercury and arsenic, heavy metals can be found in cosmetics. Phthalates, common contaminant in cosmetics, formaldehyde, a chemical found in some makeup.
-
Unknown B
Yeah, man. That's why a lot of comedian back then stopped black facing.
-
Unknown A
Man, that's scary. That's scary. I wonder if that contributes to a higher incidence of certain issues, health issues that maybe women have that wear it, use it daily.
-
Unknown B
I wonder how many gotta wonder, right? How about the. The people that worked the news back then in the 450? They were a shitload of makeup.
-
Unknown A
Oh, yeah, yeah. And what the kind of makeup did they had back then? That's probably all chemicals.
-
Unknown B
Cake makeup.
-
Unknown A
Yeah.
-
Unknown B
What the.
-
Unknown A
Yeah, yeah, man. Like, you don't have to wear that. Ladies without. We're not that complicated.
-
Unknown B
You gotta wear makeup when you do the UFC fights.
-
Unknown A
No, I don't wear anything. I'm like, are you crazy? I have to go in there with dudes who literally have their head split open. You know, I have to interview people that are soaked in blood and sometimes the blood is spitting out onto the mic. That happens all the time. I get blood on me all the time. Like, the idea of me wearing makeup to look better while I'm out, while they're dealing with people that just got their face punched in, is crazy. That's ridiculous. I won't do it.
-
Unknown B
So when they're speaking to you, like, when you get a fighter that's real bloody, like, you can. What. What's. You're really up close to these guys, what do you see in their eyes after a fight? Like when they're. And they're also bleeding, man. Do you see, like. You see, like, their intensity, man. You see things like other people don't see. When you're interviewing, I'm sure you see something. You've been in a few there in a fight right in front of them.
-
Unknown A
Yeah. I think you're probably going to get more of a sense of how they feel after it's over. Like, there's, like, some historic moments where you could see that when the fighter wins, it's like, it's a big deal. And one of my favorite ones was when Israel Adesanya had his second UFC fight against Alex Per. He knocks him down, knocks him out cold. Beautiful clean right hand and finished him on the ground. And then fires off three arrows into his body.
-
Unknown B
Yeah, I remember that guy. Yes.
-
Unknown A
I mean, that was a classic moment. And then he grabs a microphone and gives, like, one of the most, most inspirational speeches. Pull that speech up.
-
Unknown B
Yeah.
-
Unknown A
Because it's amazing. This is my favorite moment. I think of anybody after they want to fight, because it's just like, this was real in the moment. From a guy who's the boogeyman, dude, Alex Pereira is the boogeyman. He's the scariest in the sport. He knocked Izzy out twice. He left hook KO'd him in kickboxing, and then he beat him down in the ufc, and then Izzy finally knocked him out. And when he knocked him out, when he fires those arrows into his body and then. See, if you find that speech and when you hear it, man, you're like, wow, that's like. That's what. That's what makes the whole career worth it. These moments where you reach out.
-
Unknown B
I remember that kid.
-
Unknown A
And you touch the world. I hope every one of you can.
-
Unknown B
Feel this level of happiness just one.
-
Unknown A
Time in your life.
-
Unknown B
You never feel this level of happiness if you don't go for something.
-
Unknown A
When they knock you down, when they talk about you, if you stay down, you will never, ever get that result.
-
Unknown B
Fortify your mind and feel this level of happiness as you rise one time in your life. But I'm blessed to be able to.
-
Unknown A
Feel this again and again and again.
-
Unknown B
And again and again.
-
Unknown A
Amazing. Amazing. That's like human fuel. You hear someone saying something like that after doing something like that, that can help you all throughout your day as human fuel. Amazing. Amazing.
-
Unknown B
If you're gonna go, go all the way or don't even try. Yeah, Charles Bukowski, that guy was out. If you're gonna go, go all the way or don't even try. This could mean losing girlfriend. It could mean losing wives, relatives. It could be spots, time spent in jail, lonely nights in the dark. Lonely night by yourself. Yeah, but in the end, it's all worth it. I don't know the rest.
-
Unknown A
Yeah, that's a great. He was. Did you ever see the movie they did on with Mickey Rourke?
-
Unknown B
Both.
-
Unknown A
They did two movies they won with.
-
Unknown B
A Matt Dylan cough. Factotum too.
-
Unknown A
When was that?
-
Unknown B
That came out like in 2000 something. And he plays them at a different. I thought there's barfly and they're factotum. Fact. Told him he plays them at that.
-
Unknown A
Age and he's way too handsome.
-
Unknown B
Yeah, but how dare he? He plays them good.
-
Unknown A
How dare he. Yeah, he's way too handsome. That's outrageous. Mickey Rourke made himself look fucked up to all my friends. You know, he like.
-
Unknown B
Yeah, he. Charles Bukowski is actually in Bar Fly. He's one of the. One of the drunks in the bar.
-
Unknown A
Yeah.
-
Unknown B
All women in the world aren't whore. Just mine.
-
Unknown A
You ever see one of those readings that he used to do? He used to do these readings. He'd read from his books and people would yell and he fucking. You have hecklers and shit and yell out to them. He's just a guy just constantly drunk with profound.
-
Unknown B
Yeah, man. When I started reading, I wanted to read books about authors that were from Los Angeles, like in the 40s and 50s, because he's from the. And I said, I gotta find something that talks about Los Angeles, these streets that I live in. And it was Charles Bukowski. He writes about Los Angeles. And I found out that his inspiration was a guy named. Man, what's his name? He writes just like Charles Bukowski. He wrote a book called Ask the Dust and the Adventures of Arturo Bandini. I went. I'm. I'm lost here. Of his. Of his name, but he. John Fonte. Yes, John Fonte. John Fante wrote books in the style of Charles Bukowski. And Charles Bukowski, when. When he found out about him, he helped him publish all his books again. So that's why I know that John Fonte exists, because Charles Bukowski, he republished all his books for him when he was dying of diabetes.
-
Unknown B
So after Dust, bro, he talks about Los Angeles during 1932, bro, when Los Angeles had a. A Metro rail and the world. The 1932 earthquake in Los Angeles.
-
Unknown A
Wow.
-
Unknown B
So this. It's all about. This guy's from Los Angeles. He talks about Armenians and working the docks in 1920s.
-
Unknown A
Wow, that's a great catch.
-
Unknown B
And they're alcoholics, bro. This guy's an alcoholic and so is Charlie Bukovsky. These are dudes that work jobs and still were authors.
-
Unknown A
Imagine going from those guys to TikTokers at BOA.
-
Unknown B
Exactly. Yeah, exactly. Like these guys actually had jobs during the day. Sean Bukowski, he was at the post office. He never worked, he never quit.
-
Unknown A
Yeah.
-
Unknown B
And Arturo Brandini. Well, what's his name? The other guy? He. He started writing for Hollywood and he just disappeared.
-
Unknown A
Oh, yeah?
-
Unknown B
Yeah. Oh, like writing screenplays he got into under contract.
-
Unknown A
Yeah, man. There's a lot of like talented writers who just decide to write for a company. There's kind of like, give up on.
-
Unknown B
The job, get hired to be a writer. And then you said, this is not for me.
-
Unknown A
I got a book deal once and I gave them the money back because they were. They had too much input. They wanted to have too much input. I wanted. And then they wanted me to transcribe my stand up. That was one of their ideas. I'm like, that's a terrible idea. Like, they're like George Carney. I'm like, well, that's fine. I love George Carlin, but so what? I'm not doing that. Like, that doesn't make any sense to me. Like, why would I want like the worst version of what the ideas are, which is just print. The best version is a live performed version. Second best version is a video. Worst for sure is print. Audio is slightly better, but it's like, you don't want to do that. Why would I do that? That's a dumb way to write a book. I just want to write about things that I'm thinking about.
-
Unknown B
Yeah. Why would you write your whole set list on a book?
-
Unknown A
And then I realized if I'm going to write something, I have to to want to. And it has to be something that I do because I'm controlling the entire thing. And then if they like it, they like it. If they don't, they don't. But it's. It's not something that I would ever want to have somebody help me out with.
-
Unknown C
According to this article about him, part of the reason why he didn't explode when other writers did is because his publisher was in a legal battle for an unauthorized publication of Mein Kampf.
-
Unknown B
Whoa. Oh. I said, you know that. That's good to know.
-
Unknown A
Holy.
-
Unknown C
Yeah, I kind of.
-
Unknown A
Wow. The financial drown on the publisher hampered the distribution of Ask the Dust.
-
Unknown B
Yes.
-
Unknown A
While Fent put out a short story collection, Dago read in 1940, more than a decade would pass before another Bandini novel. Wow.
-
Unknown B
Yeah.
-
Unknown C
Created and was a bunch of stories.
-
Unknown B
About this fake he used to live in.
-
Unknown A
He got in a legal battle with Adolf Hitler.
-
Unknown C
Was his publisher did. But yeah.
-
Unknown B
That's crazy, huh? Insane.
-
Unknown A
That's crazy, dude. I'm gonna read that. Is it on audio? I hope it's on audiobook. I'm so lazy sitting down actually rating, reading a book right now. It's too daunting. It's too daunting. Felipe, one more time. Tell everybody. Special on Netflix available right now.
-
Unknown B
Oh, my Netflix special is available right now. Raging. Full on Netflix. Go check it out. Directed by my wife, Lisa O'Daniel. And I want to give a shout out to my, my, my brother in law who listens to you religiously with his daughters, Johnny O'Daniel. What's up? Shout out to Johnson, Ohio.
-
Unknown A
All right. Instagram, all that. What is it?
-
Unknown B
My Instagram is Felipe Esparza. My, my website is philippe'sworld.com. i'll be in. I don't know when this airs. I'll be in Grand Rapids, Iowa and Indianapolis. Helium.
-
Unknown A
But one of those dates.
-
Unknown B
I don't know.
-
Unknown A
Okay, go to the website. Go to the website.
-
Unknown B
April 5th, I'll be in San Diego with Paul Rodriguez. And April 25th, I'll be in San Diego with a bunch of comedians.
-
Unknown A
Beautiful. All right. Always good to see you, my brother.
-
Unknown B
Thank you for having me.
-
Unknown A
Thank you. Bye, everybody.