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Unknown A
Man, you are allowed to watch Hachiko. I think it's Richard Gere. And you can cry, and if the woman gets mad at you, you look in the eyes with anger, say, you shut your mouth.
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Unknown B
I don't think, like, as the man or the leader of the family, you should be, like, crying in front of your wife and crying in front of your daughter. Like, that's not really good either. I'm saying, like, show vulnerability and, like, your capacity to love and, like, adore your family, right? Like, be emotionally present instead of emotional.
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Unknown C
I think the key is you need to make sure that this vulner. And I'm very reluctant, say, because a lot of guys watching, I want to make sure that they're not, like, being a bitch in front of their girl, because what they'll do is they'll take that, say, oh, KE I'gonna crabt my grand. That's. It's always got to be showing emotion from a position of strength, right? It can't be showing emotion from a position of weakness, I think is the key here.
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Unknown A
The last time I cried was when Mr. Bocus died, and I absolutely cried front my w. Mr. Bous. My kid. He's on the.
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Unknown C
Oh, yes. Okay. Yeah.
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Unknown A
Yeah. He was. He was. One day you were with him.
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Unknown D
He died, unfortunately. Was in Miami.
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Unknown A
Oh, you weren't there. I thought you were there. Well, someone was there in the morning, and it reached the point where he couldn't walk anymore. His kidneys were failing. And then I came in in the morning, and he was laying there just groaning, and he couldn't walk. And I was like, this is it. We can prolong his suffering by keeping him in. So I brought him out to the chicken coop, and I laid him in the grass, which was probably 40 degrees, which I knew would lower his body temperature, and then he would die faster than just lying there, unable to move, breathe, drink, eat. And it was a brutal thing to do. Very emotional. I a cat, but he was our little mascot, and I don't give a shit. I fucking cried.
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Unknown C
Yeah. And you were by yourself o cry.
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Unknown A
I cried, like, 12 timeseah. I mean, look, carry his dead body.
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Unknown C
I think with men, right? Like, budd, you got to do that in solitude, man. Like, I think, like, just solude.
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Unknown A
I cried in front of everybody who.
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Unknown C
Was watching me sit there, I think in front of your woman, you know.
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Unknown A
I mean, it's front of Allison. And I put Mr. Boke in front of the chicken coop so he could look at the chickens one last time. And this was his End and was really. It was really sad, but funny because little dud was groaning and dying until he heard the bucking. And then he, like. Like he got so into it and it was like. I was happy to see this as I was sa. But my joke is the only time is acceptable for a man to cries when his dog dies. And I mean, that someone is a joke, like, if your kid dies too, for sure. Real.
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Unknown D
I was crying to my sleep this morning. I had a dream about my grandmother. I was with my grandma, who's dead, and she was talking to me. And then it got to the point where she was like, I want to take you over there. And I knew she was gonna leave, and I just put my head on her shoulder and I started crying. And then my alarm went off and I was like, she was over. There was like, time maybe. Maybe it was like a. She was leading me towards its'time for you to wake up and for me to go. And I woke up crying and then immediately went away because I knew it was a dream.
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Unknown A
They say that on average, men cry once a year and women cry once a month. And I'm like, I think I've cried like three times in 10 years, to be honest. Three times.
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Unknown C
Maybe it's good ratio.
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Unknown A
It's. It's like a dead dog and it's a dead cat.
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Unknown D
Like, if you're crying because you're processing something and you come out stronger, that's impressive. But if you're crying and you just can't get out of it or you won't let yourself stop, that's.
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Unknown A
I think the issue is what you're crying about. So there's very little reason a man should cry. Very little reason. But I don't. I think if it's death and it's a significant death or meaningful death, like, I don't think it's bad that a guy's crying over that. In fact, my concern would be, I feel like, bro, if you. If cat's a little bit sill, I can acknowledge that. I have no problem saying that I cried when my cat died. Was. He was our masscot in our friend. But it is a little silly. A dog, in my opinion, is more worthy of tears. I know cat lovers, sorry, but dogs are little loyal soldiers. You know, they will die for you, they will stand for you. And when the dog dies, it is a sad moment. There are certain things where yo. If a family member died and you didn't cry, I kind of think any woman, a relationship with you might be concerned about you Being a sociopath, but also, to be honest, sociopaths do really well with picking up women.
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Unknown C
Yeah. Yeah. Again, I'm not saying don't cry. I'm saying don't cry in front of your girl.
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Unknown A
My. Don't cry like a little bitch for stupid reasons. That's the issue. I think there's a degree of, like, understanding. Like, I agree with you. And I actually. I'm curious what you think actually about watching a man cry and when you would find it acceptable.
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Unknown B
Again, yeah, I think all the situations we laid out make perfect sense. Like if there's loss of a loved one or a companion, if it's an animal. I think if you're. I'm trying to think of the moments where I saw me in crin was like, oh, that's not good. I would say if it's like, about the relationship specifically, like, let's say you're going through a hard time and like, the guy's crying because the relationship is hard. That is immediate, like, y interested. And I think part of that too, to actually agree with you is we are wildly emotional, right? Like, our cycles are 28 days and they are a whirlwind. So knowing that, we want to know that you're going to be able to be like, this solid, unshakeable force. But that's not to say you're not human. So again, like, vulnerability. There's a difference between expressing emotions and being emotional.
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Unknown B
Like, women don't want to be with another woman, even though that's kind of like how they're training men these days. And then they wonder why it doesn't work. But we don't want you to be emotional. We just want you to have emotion. So, like, the stoicism thing works in the beginning, but at some point, like, I want to know that the relationship that we have is, like, it's unique. And I can access parts of you that you don't with your guys, that you don't share with the rest of the world. And it, like, it makes that relationship more real and stronger, in my opinion, because no matter what, no matter how strong you are, you're going to get sick at some point, right? Like, the flu might take you down. Old age is going to catch up. And I think it's important to know that, like, the woman can also, like, support you in those moments and that you're not just like the stoic robot that I'm not go going toa like, be able to accurately predict how that.
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Unknown B
How that performs under pressure, like in a weakened State maybe. I don't know.
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Unknown A
There's only one movie men are allowed to cry when watching. And it'sachchiko.
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Unknown B
What is it?
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Unknown A
Hachiko.
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Unknown D
What about the Notebook?
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Unknown A
No. So hard. The movie Hachiko s true story. It's the story of the Japanese professor who his dog would walk with him to the train station every day. And then when he got back from, he would go to the university to teach. And when he would come back at 5 o'clock, Hachiko would meet him there and they'd walk back home together. And then one day, the professor had a stroke while he was at the university teaching and never came back. And Hachiko waited for 10 years at the train station. Yeah. Men are. Were allowed to cry watching that. But nothing else.
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Unknown B
Dog movies never seen.
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Unknown A
Well, it s. It's literally this. It. You know, it's not even the dog. It's a story of unwavering loyalty and honor.
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Unknown D
I heard old yow made people cry.
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Unknown A
But the story of Hachiko was so impactful. In Japan, they built a statue for the dog at the train station.
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Unknown B
Is that the one with the like. There's like a hot air balloon with.
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Unknown A
The dog on the COVID I don't think so.
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Unknown B
No.
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Unknown A
I don't know.
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Unknown B
I'DON'HAVE to watch it.
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Unknown A
I should go. A true story. Yeah, the dog. And there's a lot of stories like this. That's why dogs are epic. Hachiko kept going back to the train station to wait for the dude to come back. But he was dead. Everybody knew he was dead. And for so many people, it's so brutal to be like, I can't tell the dog the guy died because we can't communicate to him. And here he is waiting for 10 years. So, man, you are allowed to watch Hachiko. I think it's Richard Gere. And you can cry. And if the woman gets mad at you, you look her in the eyes with anger. Say, you shut your mouth. I'm crying for this dog.
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Unknown D
I think, you know, if you're in a good relationship and you're crying that she would help you figure out why. And then you could move past.
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Unknown A
Well, look, look, the point is, if you're crying like a little bitch for some stupid reason, like you spilled milk. Yeah.
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Unknown D
If you're crying out of fear, that's not good.
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Unknown A
Yeah.
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Unknown D
You'reying you crying.
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Unknown C
Yeah. And this is why I'm so strong against just not showing emotions to women. Because every girl's different. Right? Like, some women will, like, look at that. And be like, what the hell? This guy's meek and weak. Other women might say, oh, I like it. And it's like, it'it's a Pandora s box that you don't really want to open up if you don't need to. I just don't think women in general are equipped to handle, you know, male vulnerability and emotions that isn't controlled. So I think for men, the general advice is control your emotions. Don't cry in front of your girl. Be the rock. Because quite frankly, you know, you need to be the leader and, you know, stism a component.
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Unknown A
I agree with that. I just, I would just say don't be weak in front of your girl. Don't be weak.
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Unknown C
Yeah, yeah, yeah. And this is also controvers again, this is why I don't listen to women. No offense to you. Direction. I don't think, like, you know, I think women give really bad advice to men when it comes to being attractive because. And I'll show you what I mean by this. So on my show, when we have the girls on, I actually give them mics, right? And what I'll do is I'll role play and I'll be a female. I'm like, okay, I want you to attract me and I will go ahead and behave like a regular girl. Oh, I have a boyfriend. Oh, I'm, you know, yeah, we can hang out sometime, whatever. And their job is to get me on a date. And I find it amazing how when she's the guy and I'm the girl, she doesn't know how to navigate or deal with.
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Unknown C
Typical objections women give when men are hitting on them. Right. Cause there's girls out there that'like you, but they'll give you objections to kind of just see how you react to it. And when I employ these same tactics, like women have no idea how to overcome them. And I say all that to prove my point that men should never listen to women when dating.
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Unknown B
Ever.
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Unknown A
If you made. So there's an episode, I think it's the Orville. You ever see that show? You probably dev't. No, but there's one of the. It's a comedy version of Star Trek, basically by Seth McFarlane. And in one of the episodes they have like the holodeck, the simulation thing, and they're trying to teach this guy how to pick up chicks. And so it's like, it's like, okay, let's go'at a bar and there's one sitting down, and then he walks up to her and goes, hey, how's it going? And she looks at him right away and she goes, wow, let's go back to my place. And he's like, okay, hold on. What is this? And like, I'm sorry, the difficult setting was at a 1. And then it's like, okay, let me fix it. And then he goes to him, he's like, how's it going? And she goes, ugh, excuse me, I'm married.
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Unknown A
And he's like, oh, come on. Yeah, put a woman in one of these simulators. I would love to see a woman try to pick up a woman in, like, as. As a man, though it would be no.
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Unknown C
Cause we've literally, like, done the experiment. And it's comedy. Like, the girls, like, they'll say, oh, I have a section. Come hang out, whatever. And they use all the bad pickup lines that they complain that men use on them. And it's like, fuck, it's mind boggling, bro. And I'm like, wait, hold on, hold on. Do you really think that you saying that you're gonna give this girl $1000 is gonna work? And she's like, yeah, guys do it to me all the time. And I was like, do you go out? And she was like, no, I don't. And I was like, so why the hell would you try here? But this is one. I mean, when I say, like, most women have zero clue what it takes to be attractive as a man.
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Unknown A
Thanks for watching this clip from the Culture War podcast. We're live every Friday, 10am to noon, so subscribe and come hang out.